No Alternative
by hana-to-mame
Summary: AU.  Logan Mitchel and and James Diamond are the hottest singing sensation.  Kendall Knight is a homeless man.  And Carlos Garcia is a famous journalist trying to get to the bottom of everything. Slash.  Kogan.  Little bit of Jarlos.
1. Sentenced

**No Alternative (A Big Time Rush fanfic)**

**Rated: T**

**Pairing: Kogan**

**Summary: ****AU. Logan Mitchel and and James Diamond are the hottest singing sensation. Kendall Knight is a homeless man. And Carlos Garcia is a famous journalist trying to get to the bottom of everything. Slash. Kogan. Little bit of Jarlos.**

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**Chapter 1 - Sentenced (Posted 10 February 2011)**

"Hello, boys, Carlos Garcia here. Let's get down to business. So," the reporter asked from across the table, "Big Time Rush, the duo taking the world by storm, how does it feel to be suddenly so famous?"

"Well," said the tall, pretty member of the duet, "it hasn't quite sunk in yet. We're not even sure of what's going on.:

"Yeah," the smaller boy added, "we never imagined, well we did, but we never actually _thought_ we'd get here."

"You're parents must be awfully proud." Carlos commented.

"No, every day they call trying to get us to come home." the shorter boy laughed. "Telling us it isn't going to last long."

"Yeah, but we don't care." the pretty one said with a smile that glinted in the afternoon sun. "Whether we get to live our dream for a day or for the rest of our lives, all that matters is we lived it."

"Ok, how about answering some questions from the fans?" the interviewer asked and then proceeded when he received enthusiastic nods from the band. "The first one is for James. How do you get your hair so _perfect_?"

James giggled. "That, my friend, will remain a mystery. It's a secret; I can't have all the other guys stealing my pretty hair."

"True." Carlos agreed. He _did_ appreciate the prettiness of James Diamond's hair. "Ok, now one for Logan. What is your favorite kind of lip gloss to taste when you kiss someone?"

"That's a bit of an awkward question." Logan said with a smirk. "Most of the people I kiss don't wear lipgloss. But for the ones that do, I would say peach. There's just something about that fruit that really drives me crazy."

"Nice." Carlos said as he jotted this all down in his little notebook. "Now, this one is for both of you. There have been rumors about your sexuality. Would you mind clearing those up for me?"

"You are one gutsy reporter." James said, leaning forward and propping his head up on his arms. "No one else has asked us that."

"Well, I'm very good at my job." Carlos also leaned closer.

"I bet you are." James winked.

Logan smacked him lightly on the shoulder. "Come on, if you don't stop flirting with the reporter, there won't be any _need_ to explain our sexualities."

"So, you _are_ gay?" Carlos asked, clearly intrigued.

"I am." Logan said, raising his hand to accentuate his confession.

"I just don't care." James said. "If I like someone, I don't see their gender, I see them."

"Thanks guys," Carlos said excitedly, "this is gonna make my piece an instant hit!"

"No problem. We would have told if someone would have just asked us." James said proudly.

"Yeah," Logan said in agreement, "it's not a secret or anything."

"Well, you two did me a huge favor by letting me interview you. If you ever need anything, let me know. I've got friends in high places." Carlos said with a wide smile.

"Is the interview oveR?" James asked.

Carlos shoved his notebook and pen into his tiny messenger bag which was slung over his shoulder. "Yep, that about does it. The rest I'm going to write about what I saw at the performance, which was amazing, by the way."

"So, " James asked with a twitch of his eyebrows, "would it be alright if I asked you to dinner?"

"Me?" Carlos said, flapping his hand in the air to dissolve the flattery. "You don't have to butter me up, I'm going to make sure this article gives the public a positive insight to your lives."

"Oh, I'm not just buttering you up. You're cute, and I'm single."

Logan rolled his eyes at his friend's cheesy lines.

"Ok." Carlos pulled his pen out of his bag and wrote on James's hand. "Here's my number. Call me."

"Oh, I will." James said, memorizing the number.

"Well, I have to go, but I guess I'll see you around?"

"Absolutely." Logan said, waving as Carlos left. Then he turned to James and shook his head at him. "You just can't help yourself, can you?" he teased.

"Hey, did you not notice how _adorable_ he is? I've seen his picture next to some of his articles, but they do not do him justice. Plus, he was polite and kept the interview short and sweet, unlike all the other reporters who drag it out and try to find something that will ruin you and bring them fame and fortune."

"Yeah, I think we can trust whatever he's going to write about us." Logan said.

"You ready to party?"

"Definitely!"

X

Since that day concluded all the shooting required for their latest music video, there was a party at Logan's house for everyone involved in the production. Food, dancing, and of course Alcohol.

Logan got really drunk. The kind of drunk where he couldn't even remember why he was drinking, drunk. And, of course, as alcohol usually does to the quiet intellectuals, it turned him into a foul-mouthed party animal and he ended up cursing out a bunch of cops when they came to check up on a disturbance.

That landed him in court.

James was there to back him up, of course, saying that the police were out of line because there was hardly anything going on. But then they played a video someone had taken from a few buildings away, and you could clearly hear the loud music playing and the strobe lights pulsing, along with the thick clouds of what was obviously marijuana smoke.

Logan denied any charges of possession or usage of pot, as he hadn't even been aware of it's presence because he was too drunk to notice anything else. But, since it was his house, he did have to take the blame for the blaring party. A five thousand dollar fine. Chump change. But, he also assaulted a police officer, which wasn't a crime that you could get out of by flashing some cash. So, Logan Mitchel, international heartthrob and famous musician, was sentenced to three months of community service.


	2. The Soup Kitchen

**Chapter 2 - The Soup Kitchen (Posted 12 February 2011)**

**A/N: This is just to say that I have another BTR fic going at the same time as this called "The Whipping Boy" and it's Kames. Also AU. Just wanted to put that out there in case you're interested :D Also, thank you everyone for faving and subscribing! I don't think I've ever gotten such an immediate positive response to a story! More reviews would be nice, but I'm really glad so many people liked the beginning of this!**

"I can't believe I have to do this three nights a week!" Logan whined into his cell phone as his chauffeur drove him to the first place he'd be doing his community service hours. It's been a week since the trial and today was Logan's first day of punishment.

"Yeah, the press is going to be all over you." James said from the other end of the line.

"Don't remind me. But speaking of press, have you called that reporter yet?"

"No." James said ashamedly. "I want to... I just don't want him to think the only reason I want to go out with him is so he doesn't make us look bad."

"You really like him?"

"Yes."

"Aaw." Logan cooed teasingly. "My little James is growing up."

"Oh, stuff it. So My crush on him has lasted longer than two days, no big deal."

"It is so a big deal. You've talked about nothing but him since the interview _and_ you're afraid of hurting his feelings. Sounds like you might have actual feelings for this guy."

"I barely know him! But anyway, so what if I do have feelings for him? Nothing wrong with that."

"Of course there's nothing wrong with it. It's just odd that you're this attracted to someone. I think that only ever happened once before." Logan commented, knowing how random yet completely predictable his friend was.

"Well, I like him, but I don't want him to think I only like him because he's a reporter."

"Well, tell him that."

"But I don't want him to think I think he's paranoid or anything!"

"Just call him, James. He knows we're real. I'm sure he's waiting by the phone, you're probably hurting his feelings by _not_ calling."

"Shit, you're probably right." James cursed, not having realized this. "I'm gonna call him right now."

"Good, I'm proud of you. Good luck."

"Yeah, you too."

"Ugh." Logan sighed and hung up. He really did want James to be successful with this Carlos guy. He seemed nice, and James needed someone he really liked right now. Logan wished he could find someone, but he was so busy with the band and watching out for his hazardous bandmate that he really didn't have time for a relationship or anything. Not that he could find anyone who was genuinely interested in him instead of his fame.

He knew someday he'd find someone, if he just waited patiently for the right time and person to come alone. That belief was what kept him from going crazy.

"We have arrived, Mr. Mitchell." the driver said as he turned off the limo.

"Ok," Logan said, sliding his sunglasses on his face. "Let's get this over with."

Logan stepped out of the Limo and wasn't surprised when more than thirty reporters jumped out from behind bushes and out of garbage cans and came running over to him.

"Mr. Mitchell, how do you plan on rebuilding your fanbase?"

"Logan, what is your response to this horrible punishment you've been made to serve?"

"Did you really smoke pot?"

"Are you really gay?"

"How does it feel to be labeled a criminal?"

Logan just ignored them. He walked by them and into the soup kitchen where he would serve his punishment for the first month. He had to help prepare the food, serve the homeless who came there, and help with clean-up at the end of his shift.

He walked in the obviously crumbling building, shutting the doors behind the paparazzi. They weren't allowed to follow him inside until they started serving for the dinner shift.

He walked in and the other volunteers were just starting to cook the food. None of them made a big deal that the international superstar was there, and they didn't say anything about him being forced to do this. They just treated him like a normal person, and he was grateful for that.

They made lunchmeat and vegetarian sandwiches with white and wheat bread. They also cooked tomato and chicken noodle soup and cut up different fruits to make a fruit salad. All the food was donated by locals and volunteers, so there was no set menu, this is just what they had on hand for the day.

When the doors were opened, Logan stood in his position on the serving aisle and saw the long line of homeless people waiting to be fed. Looking at them made him remember how lucky he is to have all he does. A little community service wasn't such a horrible thing. It almost made him proud to be helping out. And he was awful lucky to actually be happy with the punishment he was given. It really stuck it to the legal system. All the terrible things people do like rape and murder, and the law busts _him_ for throwing a little party. Tisk tisk, America.

Shaking his head to bring him from his political daydreaming, he remembered where he was and what he was supposed to be doing. He swirled his huge ladle in the vat of chicken noodle soup he stood at, waiting for one of the homeless to come over to him.

But none did. He watched them get a sandwich and then fruit, and then head over to the person serving the tomato soup. Then they'd sit down and eat. Some of them looked at him, but then looked away and chose the other soup. Why wouldn't they come to him.

He could see all the reporters walking around, interviewing the other workers. Some even spoke to the homeless.

Finally, Logan spotted a blond man looking at him. Staring at him was more like it. He didn't look much older than himself, he might have even be younger for all Logan knew. But he was definitely just a teenager. His clothes were tattered and dingy, but he looked fairly clean compared to some of the others. He stood a few feet away with a sandwich, fruit, and a glass of water on his tray, soup bowl empty. He was obviously trying to decide which soup to get. Looking around, he sauntered over to Logan and held out his tray, smiling as the soup was poured into his bowl

"Thank you." the boy said humbly, surprising Logan.

"Y-you're welcome."

"So, the rumors are true. Logan Mitchell is doing his community service at our soup kitchen." the boy said with amusement in his eyes.

"Yep, that's me." Logan said embarrassed.

"Everyone thought you would have thrown a fit and demanded another punishment."

"I'm not like that."

"That's not what the others think."

"Is that why no one other than you has come over here?" Logan said in a hushed voice.

"Sure is." the boy declared. "They all decided they wouldn't come to you no matter what you were serving."

"So... why are you here?" Logan said sadly. Why would homeless people hate him so much?

"Because I love chicken noodle soup." the boy said with a smile. "The others think they're too proud to be served by a self-serving pop star who is only doing this because he has to. But I'm not. I'm hungry, and I don't care who's serving me."

"I'm not only doing this because I have to." Logan said in defense.

"Sure you're not." the boy laughed. "So, are you gonna stick around after your month is up?"

Logan hesitated. He hadn't thought about it. He probably would have if the homeless hadn't boycotted him. "I..."

"Didn't think so."

"It's not that I don't want to. But I'm going to go somewhere else after this. I might come back." Logan crossed his arms.

"Oh yeah?" the teen arched his bushy eyebrows. "I hope I'm here to see that."

"Oh, you will."

"My name's Kendall." the boy stuck his hand out to Logan.

Logan shook it without hesitation, not breaking eye contact.

"Well, you can't be all bad if you're not afraid to shake a homeless man's hand. See you around, Logan." Kendall walked off and sat at a table with a few older people.

The rest of the night, Logan stood behind his vat of soup without even having to lift the ladle. Even when they ran out of tomato soup, no one came over to him.

_This is going to be the longest month of my life_, Logan thought.

At the end of the night, Logan swept the floor and was thanked for all his hard work and his willingness to help with anything else.

He was also informed that he would be permanently moved to clean-up crew during the dinner shift. No one said anything as to why, but he knew it was because no one would take whatever he served. It was probably better if he just cleaned up the messes as the homeless came and went instead of serving any food. He didn't want them to go hungry, even if it was for a stupid reason.

**A/N: Ok, so it might be a week or two until I update any of my stories. I'm not abandoning them or anything, but I just found out that I probably won't be able to afford to go to college, so I'm kind of at a loss for inspiration right now. I'll find my muse eventually, but I'm gonna take some time off to figure a few things out.**


	3. The Real Carlos Garcia  Part 1

**Chapter 3 - The Real Carlos Garcia Part 1 (Posted 16 February 2011)**

**A/N: This chapter is supposed to tell what is going on with James while Logan starts at the soup kitchen. It's happening while chapter 2 is happening. Does that make sense? Well I hope it does. And you all are very lucky because I had my creative writing class last night and that class makes me extremely happy no matter what is going on in my life, so I was inspired to write this chapter right away. Please enjoy, and thank my awesome teacher.**

James held the phone in his hand, ready to call Carlos. He'd memorized the number that had been written on his hand, but he'd also programmed it into speed dial. Number 2, the highest honor.

All he had to do was press the button. Just press the freaking button and ask him out! But he was so nervous. And being nervous only made him more nervous because James Diamond doesn't get nervous. At all. For any reason.

But Carlos made him nervous.

But he wanted to talk to him so bad. He just had to call him. It was ungentlemanly to go this long without calling, and he would apologize profusely, but he had to actually _call_ him first.

So he pressed the button and heard the sound of the phone ringing on the other end of the line. It picked up, and a smooth voice answered.

"¿Bueno?"

"Oh." James said, wondering if this was Carlos or someone else. His spanish wasn't that good. "Um, hola... and... stuff. Uh, I'm looking for Carlos Garcia?"

"That's me." Carlos's voice was cheery.

"Hi, it's James from Big Time Rush... I don't know if you remember but..." James was searching for what to say. Where was his poetic nature at a time like this?

"Sí, I remember you." Carlos said sexily. "The boy with the handsome smile and gigantic eyes."

"Don't forget the perfect hair." James quipped.

"Of course not, how could I? So... you wanted to ask me something...?"

"Yeah. Carlos... I know this might seem weird to you but when you hung out with us at the performance and at the studio that day... well... I liked having you around and I... I was hoping you would come on a date with me."

"Hmmm, a date?" Carlos asked pensively. "I do recall you mentioning taking me out to dinner... I'd really enjoy that."

"Great!" James actually jumped for joy at Carlos's acceptance. "When would you like to go?"

"Well, not to sound to forward, but I'm free tonight. I've got jobs for the next two weeks so I'll be busy but I'd really like to go out with you, James, so if tonight works for you..."

"Oh, it works." James said happily. "What time should I pick you up?"

"Seven?"

"Seven." James agreed. He wrote down Carlos's address and directions to his place. It was good he had an awesome memory though, because he was so nervous that his hands were shaking and he couldn't even read what he wrote. "I... I'm really looking forward to this, Carlos."

"So am I." Carlos said, his voice showing his smile as if he were right in front of James.

"Ok, so, I'll see you then?"

"You bet. Bye, James."

"Bye." James hung up the phone with the widest smile he thought he'd ever worn. He was in deep. He'd never felt this way about anyone, especially so quickly. At first he thought maybe it was just because it had been a while since he had a relationship. But then he discarded that thought, because he knew he really liked Carlos, and judging by his enthusiasm, he liked him a lot as well. And he wasn't ashamed to admit that.

He spend all day trying to decide what to wear and where to take him. Should he bring him anything? Which car should he drive? What should they talk about?

A few thoughts crossed his mind about Logan. How he was doing and stuff. And he worried about him a little, but not too much. Logan was a tough guy, he could handle himself.

As he was getting dressed, his phone rang. It was Logan.

"Hey, dude, I was just thinking about you." he said as he answered.

"That's not creepy at all." Logan said sarcastically.

"Is someone in a bad mood?" James feigned a pouty voice.

"No..." Logan said apologetically. "Sorry, things didn't go so well at the soup kitchen."

"What happened?"

"The homeless people wouldn't let me serve them. They boycotted me!"

James tried to be serious for his friend. He knew he was upset and didn't want to disrespect him. But he couldn't help it. He belted out a laugh so boisterous, Logan's driver (who also cracked a smile) could hear it.

"James, it's not funny!"

"Oh, Logie, lighten up. I'm sorry you got your feelings hurt."

"I'm not hurt." Logan protested.

"Then why are you pouting about it to me?"

"I... because... ok fine, it may have hurt my feelings just a little bit."

"See? Now listen, I know you're hurt and if I know you at all I'd say you're probably feeling a little guilty about so many homeless people not eating because of you. But Logan, think about it. They're _homeless_, if they pass up free food, it's on their heads. You were trying to help them, they only have themselves to blame."

"I know but..." Logan didn't know what to say. He knew what James was saying made sense, but he still couldn't bear to think about homeless people starving because of him. "I guess that's true."

"So there. Just try again next time, they'll warm up to you eventually." James said softly.

"No, they're not having me serve anymore." Logan said sheepishly. "They want me to be cleaning crew during Dinner time. That way everyone will eat."

"Seriously? You mean to tell me that not a single person got food from you?"

"Well... one person did. But that's it, just one."

"The whole time?"

"The whole time."

"Well, he was probably the smartest one of all of them." James commented. Really, who passes up free food when they never know when their next meal could be?

"He did seem exceedingly intelligent for a homeless person." Logan agreed, remembering how educated the boy had sounded.

"Are you sure he was really homeless?"

"Yeah, he looked tattered and dirty, although it looked like he tried to look his best..."

"Maybe he only recently became homeless."

"Maybe. But that's so sad." Logan really felt for poor Kendall. "I mean, it's sad for anyone to be homeless, but to be homeless your entire life must be so different from actually having a home and losing it."

"Did he have any family with him?"

"Not that I saw. He was all alone. He looked about our age. Eighteen, maybe nineteen."

James had a peculiar thought. "What did he say to you?"

"Say?" Logan asked, confused. "Well... he said the others were too proud come to me because I was a selfish pop star. But he said he didn't care who was serving him, he was hungry."

"Ok, but did he say anything else?"

"Um... he introduced himself to me and shook my hand. His name is Kendall."

"Well, Logan, I think this Kendall guy might have a crush on you."

"What! James, you think _everyone_ has a crush on us." Logan disputed his theory.

"I'm serious. He went out of his way to not only get food from someone everyone told him not to, but to talk to you as well. He likes you."

"No he doesn't. Like he said, he was hungry. And I told him I wasn't only doing it because I had to, so I guess I changed his opinion of me and he... I don't know... he was shocked or something."

"He likes you." James said simply.

"What am I gonna do with you?" Logan shook his head even though he knew James couldn't see him.

"Oh yeah! I called Carlos Garcia!"

"Good! How did it go?"

"We're going out to dinner tonight. I was just getting dressed when you called."

"Oh, I'm sorry to interrupt you. I'll let you go for now, but I want to know how it goes, ok?"

"Got it."

After hanging up, James finished dressing himself. When his phone rang again, he was prepared to yell at Logan (nicely, of course) to leave him alone so he could prepare for his date. But when he looked at the screen, it was a number he didn't recognize.

"Hello?"

"James?"

James recognized the voice, having committed the sexy, flawless tone to memory, but he was confused since he'd just talked to this person a few hours ago.

"Carlos?"

"Yeah..."

"You're... not canceling on me, are you?" James said, a little worried.

"No! Um... no. I... I actually feel a little silly calling you like this. I must seem like a lost little puppy." Carlos said quietly.

"No, of course not..." James said sweetly.

"Well.. I just called to ask... that really was you on the phone earlier, right?"

"What? Yeah, of course it was really me." James said, not liking the sad quality of Carlos's voice.

"And... it wasn't like... oh man I feel so weird asking this but... it wasn't a joke or anything, was it? You really want to go out with me? Because if it was a joke then you..."

"Woah, Carlos..." James said as soothingly as possible. "I promise, that was really me and I really want to go out with you. Trust me, I wouldn't play a joke like this on you, I swear."

"You swear?"

"Absolutely."

"Ok. Good. Thanks." Carlos said, obviously relieved.

"No problem." James said happily. "I'll be at your house in about a half hour, ok?"

"Ok."

James hung up and although he was happy he had a date with Carlos, he wondered why he would ask him a question like that. It made him almost want to cry to think that Carlos would automatically assume it had to be a joke. Who would do that to a person? James was all about games and pranks, but some things just crossed too far over the line.

But he really did like Carlos. A lot. More and more with each passing moment, he kept thinking about him and how badly he wants to get to know him. And how he wanted to make sure Carlos never again felt afraid to go on a date. He had to show Carlos he was special.

**A/N: So, my wonderful night class temporarily brought me out of my stupor long enough to write this. And my teacher was eating a lollipop for the first few minutes of class, so, you know, that triggered some interesting daydreams. And so I just wanted to let you all know that I'm working on finding some inspiration so that I can come back to writing full-time again. Things are getting better, so I can assure you that I won't leave you in suspense much longer. And thanks to everyone for all your support, it hasn't gone unnoticed or unappreciated :)**


	4. The Real Carlos Garcia Part 2

**Chapter 4 - The Real Carlos Garcia Part 2 (Posted 21 February 2011)**

**A/N: So it didn't take me as long as I thought it would to get my inspiration back. Yay :D I swear, a marathon of the Suite Life series is all I need to take all my troubles away lol. So now I'm back to writing and most of my stories should updated by the weekend and I might be posting one or two new stories. I bounce back fast, don't I?**

James had originally planned on leaving with only just enough time to make it to Carlos's house. He didn't want to seem too eager.

But he _was_ eager.

He was so anxious that he thought he was going to explode.

And he didn't feel embarrasses about it. He wasn't afraid to admit it to himself that he really wanted to see Carlos. And he wouldn't have been afraid to scream it to a crowd of people had one been around.

Plus, it sounded like Carlos needed to see how excited James was to go out with him. He thought maybe in this case, appearing eager would bee a _good_ thing.

So he left his house right away and arrived at Carlos's house ten minutes early. He raced out of his car and up the long walkway to Carlos's front door, pressing the button and waiting not so patiently.

He felt a little nervous as the door creaked open and Carlos peeked out.

"James." A soft smile lit up Carlos's face.

"Hi." James returned the smile. "I... I know I'm early... but I couldn't wait to see you. If you're not ready yet..."

"Oh, no, I'm ready." Carlos said as he opened the door all the way.

"Wow." James's jaw hit the floor. He knew Carlos was a stunning man. But this. This was _beautiful_. He wore a dark suit with a purple shirt and tie underneath. His hair was messily slicked back, fitting for a fancy dinner or a midnight rave. "You look... amazing."

"You don't look so bad yourself." Carlos leaned into him a bit. He batted his eyelashes, stunning James for a moment.

"I... uh..." James couldn't form an intelligent thought as he caught a whiff Carlos's exotic cologne and looked into his big, beauteous eyes.

"What's the matter?" Carlos asked breathily. "Cat got your tongue?"

James laughed nervously. He was a little scared that he was so nervous. That didn't really happen to him. Or ever, for that matter. But he liked it. He liked the way being so close to Carlos made his breath hitch and his skin sprout goosebumps. He liked how his palms got sweaty and his heart beat just a little faster. "Yeah." he said, finally remembering to breathe.

"Well, let's go." Carlos practically leaped out the door and took hold of James's arm, pulling him close as they walked to James's car.

"Where would you like to go?" James asked as he began driving in no specific direction. "I would have made reservations somewhere, but on such short notice..."

"No, that's fine." Carlos said sweetly. "You don't have to take me anywhere too fancy."

"But I want to." James said.

Carlos looked over at him, just a hint of shock in his eyes. But that was overshadowed by the happiness shining through them. "Thanks. But seriously, anywhere you take me is fine."

"Okay." James said, knowing a great place that wasn't too far but was far enough that they'd have a lot of time to talk.

The whole ride there they talked about their jobs. James told Carlos what it was really like to be a famous pop star, not the mumbo jumbo they are forced to tell the tabloids. And Carlos told of all the adventures he'd been on as a reporter.

"You know..." Carlos said quietly before they reached the restaurant. "If we would... start... you know, dating... I wouldn't be able to do any editorials on Big Time Rush. I could still do straight news, you know like tour dates and appearances and stuff, but any opinion pieces would be out of the question."

"Is that... a bad thing?" James asked, wondering why Carlos brought it up. "I mean, will that be bad for your career? Because..."

"Oh no! No it won't hurt my career or anything." Carlos said, kind of happy that James's first concern was him. "I'm just mentioning it because... well, not all reporters are going to write _nice_ things about you and..."

"That doesn't bother me." James said, finally catching on to what Carlos was trying to say. "I can handle picky journalists. And it's a small price to pay for a guy like you."

Carlos pretended to slap his arm. "You don't know that, we haven't even started our first date yet."

"I have a good eye for these things." James said with a comforting smile. "I think it'll all be worth it."

Carlos blushed, and James realized it must have been a serious blush if he could see it on Carlos's darker skin. But it looked cute on him. He hoped he could make it happen again.

X

"I've never heard of this place." Carlos said as he and James walked into the unfamiliar restaurant.

"I know. It's a nice little place. I love it here. I come here sometimes to think about things, you know? It's like my secret hiding place. Not even Logan knows about it." James explained.

"But, you're okay with bringing me here?"

"Yep." James smiled.

"James..."

James doubted himself. Was that too weird? It was only their first date and already he was taking him somewhere special to him. _Way to go, moron_, James thought.

"That's really sweet." Carlos said shyly.

James smiled, all traces of doubt gone. "Carlos... I know we haven't known each other long, but that doesn't change the fact that I know you're special."

"Special?" Carlos looked down. "Sometimes I don't feel so special."

"Well, I have a feeling that's going to change soon."

Carlos didn't take his eyes off James as they were seated in a secluded little section (James's usual spot) and given menus. They ordered and decided to talk more until their food came.

"So," James said, "about your phone call..." he said the words softly, trying not to make Carlos uncomfortable.

Carlos shut his eyes in embarrassment. "Yeah... I'm sorry I seemed so pathetic."

"You're not pathetic, Carlos." James said, watching as Carlos opened his eyes. "I don't think you're pathetic at all. I just... wanted to know why you were so worried."

"It's not a big deal, really." Carlos slouched into his seat.

"It must be. You sounded so... scared. And sad." James said, remembering how Carlos's voice had almost made him want to cry. "I just wanted to know if I could help..."

"Please, James." Carlos whispered. "Not here..."

"Ok." James said. "I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. But if you want to talk about it, I want to listen."

Carlos finally smiled. "Thanks. I'll keep that in mind."

James was satisfied with his response, taking it to mean that they would talk about it.

The meal was delicious and they continued to talk about work and their friends and things they liked to do in their free time.

On the drive back to Carlos's house, they told each other the stupidest jokes they could think of.

James walked Carlos up the walk to his house slowly.

"I had a really nice time with you, Carlos." James said carefully.

"I had a nice time too." Carlos smiled. "Do... do you want to... come in?"

"Sure." James's smile brightened, happy that his night with Carlos didn't have to end yet.

"Ok." Carlos looked a little bashful as he unlocked his door and led them inside, showing James where he could hang his jacket. "It's not very big, but it's home."

"It's nice." James said, liking the homey feel.

"I'll get us some wine." Carlos said as he disappeared around a corner. "You can make yourself at home in the living room through the door on your left."

James nodded to himself as he went into the living room. There was a sofa, a recliner, and a rocking chair. James opted to sit on the sofa so Carlos could it close to him.

As he was sitting, Carlos came in the room with two small glasses of wine, handing James one.

"Thanks." James said, loving Carlos's smile as he sat down beside him.

"I don't get asked out a lot." Carlos said as he felt James put an arm around his shoulders.

"What?"

"Earlier... you wanted to know why I sounded so paranoid on the phone. It's because I don't get asked out a lot. And the few times I was... they weren't very positive experiences."

"Carlos... you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." James said, feeling how tense Carlos was.

"No, I want to." Carlos looked right into James's eyes. "I really like you. And I want you to know... that I've been hurt a lot. And I'm really scared. I'm giving you the benefit of the doubt because you seem different but... it's still really scary for me to do this."

"I'm not going to hurt you, Carlos." James said seriously. "I'm not that kind of guy." he played with Carlos's hair a little bit, causing the smaller boy to relax into his embrace a little. "And I'm really glad you're giving me a chance. Maybe... I'll be the one to take the hurt away."

"You shouldn't say things like that on a first date." Carlos chuckled sadly.

"But I mean it. I don't know what it is about you but I haven't stopped thinking about you since that interview."

"Really?"

"Really." James answered quietly. "And like I said before, if you want to... tell me about it... I'd be more than happy to listen to you. I think we all need that sometimes, someone to just listen to our problems. Someone we know we can trust not to judge us or hurt us."

"And I can trust you like that?"

That stung a little. "You don't have to, but you can."

"I think... eventually I might. Ok? I just... not right now."

"I can handle that." James smiled softly down at him.

Carlos gazed at him, wondering where this man came from. He'd never met anyone as sweet or caring as James. "Thanks." He let himself snuggle just a little closer to James, absorbing his warmth like he couldn't live without it. "Do you want to stay for a little bit? Maybe watch a movie or something?"

"I'd love to."

Carlos leaned forward to retrieve the remote before leaning back into James's welcoming embrace. They picked a movie on On Demand and with each passing second, James could feel Carlos becoming more tired. About halfway through the movie, he heard a light breath that told him Carlos was asleep. _This is so adorable_, James thought as he looked down at the sleeping boy.

He rubbed his shoulder gently. "Carlos?" he called quietly.

Carlos's eyes fluttered open, but closed again as he fell back asleep.

James smiled. He gingerly pulled himself off the couch and hoisted Carlos into his arms, trying not to wake him. He left the living room and saw a set of stairs and assumed Carlos's bedroom would be on the second floor. So he went up the stairs and opened the first door he saw. It was a bathroom. The next door was a closet. Finally, the door at the end of the hall opened to a surprisingly large bedroom.

He carried Carlos over to the bed and laid him down, taking his shoes off and pulling the top cover over him. He watched Carlos sleep for a few minutes, wondering what he was dreaming about, hoping it was a happy dream.

He silently tip toed out of the room and closed the door behind him. Then he went and took their empty wine glasses to the kitchen and set them in the sink. He left knowing he'd found someone that was going to become very important to him.


	5. Who Said You're My Friend?

**Chapter 5 - Who Said You're My Friend? (Posted 26 February 2011)**

Logan was sat at home, drinking a can of flat beer and staring at the dark television screen. He'd wanted to watch something, but was too tired to actually turn the thing on. So he just sat there, sipping the can of beer he'd opened that morning before heading to the soup kitchen. He'd been nursing it for a couple hours, hating the taste, but he kept on drinking it because he had nothing better to do. He realized, though, that he shouldn't be so worked up about a bunch of homeless people boycotting him. He stood and poured the remaining liquid down the drain in his bathroom and tossed the can into the waste bin.

That was when James called.

"Hey, James, how was your date with Carlos?" he answered after peeking at the Caller ID.

"It was amazing, Logan. I took him to a classy little diner and we talked." James sounded more enthusiastic about this than anything. "We really got close. It was only one date, but I feel like we really know each other. I... I think I just might be falling for him."

"That's great, James." Logan said, happy for his friend. "You know what this means though, don't you? No more playing the field. No more chasing after random men and women."

"So?"

Logan smiled and laughed softly. "And that's the sign that the feelings are real."

"Huh?"

"You don't care about not only being tied to one person. That says that you're ready to commit to them."

"I think it's time." James said with a chuckle.

"We're only eighteen."

"Yeah, but I've been through a lot more than the other people our age." James said, thinking of the struggles he had to overcome to get where he is. "You and me both have."

"True. Plus, parents everywhere will feel safer knowing you're not single anymore." Logan said.

"Ha ha ha. Anyway, we're not even a couple for sure yet. It's still so new, you know? And... I don't want to rush him. He seems really fragile, and I think it's best if I just start out being his friend, and then let him decide if he wants more."

"You'd do that for him?"

"Yep."

"Aaw, James." Logan joked. "I gotta meet this guy. Anyone who can turn top-rate player James Diamond into a romantic prince charming has to be like a super hero or something."

"You ever think about quitting the band and becoming a comedian?" James asked sarcastically.

"Sorry." Logan said, knowing James had had enough and was serious. "I just like picking on you. So when are you going out with him again?"

"I don't know. He's busy for the next two weeks, but I'm going to call him tomorrow sometime and see when we can see each other again."

"I'm happy for you James."

"Thanks buddy. Good luck with your second day of community service tomorrow."

"Don't remind me." Logan sighed.

X

The next morning, Logan wondered what he would do all day. He didn't have to be at the soup kitchen until a little before dinner time, but he couldn't really do much outside without being mobbed by the press.

So he sat around watching movies. He tried to read a few times, but every time he would get sidetracked. He just kept thinking about those stupid homeless people boycotting him. And Kendall being the only one who dared get soup from him. And then that would bring up thoughts about what James said. Did Kendall have a crush on him?

And from there he couldn't stop thinking about him. Why was he homeless? Where was his family? Why did he seem so happy? How long had he been homeless? Was he really homeless at all? How old was he?

Before he knew it, it was time to be at the soup kitchen. So he called his driver and had him take him there. He usually drove himself everywhere, but it was easier to deal with the press when you had a driver escort you. He wasn't sure why, it just was.

Once there, he helped prepare the food again. But instead of arming him with an apron and a ladle, he was given rubber gloves and a bucket. It was his job to wipe off tables and take all the trash left behind to the garbage cans.

It was finally time for the homeless to come in and they all shuffled in, taking their time to get through the lines. He saw Kendall come in and get his food. But instead of staying inside and taking a seat, he went outside.

Why was he eating outside? Logan wanted to go talk to him, but he had to keep cleaning up. And he could have sworn that the homeless were purposely making more messes. He watched Kendall eat as he sat on a bench across the street and then throw his stuff away in the sidewalk recycling bin. After that, he just shoved his hands in his pockets and walked away.

Logan almost felt a little sad. Yesterday he'd seemed so lively and he was getting along with everyone. So why was he all alone today?

At the end of the dinner shift, everyone pitched in the clean up the gigantic mess the homeless had left. And Logan was politely informed that tomorrow he would work in the back, out of sight. He knew they were trying not to blame him for the mess, but he knew it was his fault anyway. So he gratefully agreed to doing work in the back such as keeping track of what they had stocked and organizing new donations.

X

This went on for days. Logan would bore himself to death every night making records of everything coming and going in the soup kitchen. He'd secretly watch for Kendall to come in, and as always Kendall would take his things outside. No one would say anything to him. Thankfully, though, all the homeless people ate and they didn't make much of a mess.

Logan finally couldn't take it anymore when he saw Kendall come in with bruises all over his face and arms. He spoke with the coordinators and convinced her to let him leave early if he promised to come in extra early tomorrow. She allowed it.

He closed his log books and ran outside to see Kendall sitting on the same bench he always sat on. He sat next to him, causing Kendall to give him a confused look.

"You shouldn't be out here. What if someone sees you? You'll be mobbed." Kendall said as he chewed his food.

"Eh, it's dark out." Logan said. "Besides, I wanted to talk to you, but you never stay inside."

"That's because I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm a kid. And kids do stupid things. Like getting food from a pop star when they're hungry. And when kids do stupid things like that, the other hungry folk ostracize them."

"Ostracize?"

"Yeah, it means..."

"I know what it means." Logan cut him off. "It's just not a word I would expect a..." Logan stopped himself, feeling ashamed for what he was about to say. He didn't want to offend Kendall or anything.

But to his surprise, Kendall laughed. "You wouldn't expect a homeless guy to know it?" Kendall continued to chuckle lightly. "I get that a lot."

"So, you can't sit in there because I gave you food?" Logan asked.

"Correct. The older people won't let me sit with them, and the other kids are too afraid to sit with the guy nobody likes. Even on the streets, the cliques control them."

"Wow."

"Yeah." Kendall said, standing up. He walked to the recycling bin and dumped his garbage in. Then he continued to walk up the street.

"Wait!" Logan chased after him, catching up after only a few steps.

"Huh?"

"I wasn't done asking you questions."

"Well, maybe I was done answering them." Kendall said plainly.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't mean to intrude or..."

"I'm kidding." Kendall glanced at him and smirked. "You can ask me anything you want. I've got nothing to hide."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

"Well then..." Logan started as they continued to walk. "How old are you?"

"Eighteen."

"How long have you been homeless?"

"Um, let's see..." Kendall looked up as if he could see a calendar in the sky. "I'd say about a year, give or take a few months."

"How did you become homeless?"

"Why are you so curious?" Kendall asked with a glimmer in his eyes.

"I don't know. I kind of thought... we could be friends."

"Friends? Logan Mitchell wants to be _friends_ with a homeless kid?"

"Well..." Logan said, feeling sort of disappointed. "Never mind, then. I guess I should go." He turned around and headed back the way he came, even though he wasn't really sure where he was going to go.

"Hang on." Kendall grabbed his arm. "I didn't say we _weren't_ friends."

"What?"

"You seem like an alright guy." Kendall said. "And I could do with a friend right now. Just one thing; if I find out this is some kind of publicity thing..."

"It isn't, I promise." Logan said, shaking his head. "You're just... the only person treating me like a regular person right now."

"Hey, to me, everyone is just a regular person."

"So, where do you sleep?" Logan asked, wanting to get back to the questions.

"That's a good question." Kendall rubbed his chin. "I usually go to the shelter a few blocks that way. But I got beat up yesterday." That explained his bruises. "And they threw me out because the volunteers thought I started it. I didn't sleep anywhere last night, just wandered around."

"So, now you don't have anywhere to sleep?"

"Not exactly. There are rooftops, abandoned buildings, playground equipment. Even though I tend to stay away from that last one because I don't want to scare little kids." Kendall said with a tiny scowl.

"Well... if you need a place to stay... you could stay with me." Logan offered.

"What?"

"Yeah. Why not?"

"You just met me a week and a half ago." Kendall said. "How do you know you can trust me?"

"I don't. But I like to give people the benefit of the doubt."

"How do I know _I_ can trust _you_?"

"You don't." Logan shrugged casually. "But the offer is on the table."

"I don't know..."

"Come on. You can eat breakfast there and everything. Then you won't have to worry about getting beat up or shunned or anything."

"So, you just want me to abandon my street life to come live with a pop star I just met? Am I having some kind of crazy dream or something?"

"Nope. But you have to decide soon, I'm calling my driver to pick me up right now." Logan pulled out his cell and dialed, telling his chauffeur where to find him. "So, what's it gonna be?"

"I guess... I'll come with you."

"Awesome." Logan was truly happy. He had a new friend and he was making a difference in this person's life. He momentarily wondered if he was being crazy fro inviting a homeless man to come and live with him, but he let that thought slide right out of his mind when he saw a little smile creep onto Kendall's face. He didn't know what was drawing him to Kendall, but he knew he had to get to know him.


	6. Kendall Moves In

**Chapter 6 - Kendall Moves In (Posted 4 March 2011)**

Kendall and Logan stood on the sidewalk in silence as they waited for the driver to appear.

When the limo pulled up, Logan opened the door and held it, gesturing for Kendall to enter first. Kendall blinked at him and stood still for a second before shrugging and climbing into the back of the vehicle.

Logan slid in beside him and told the driver to take him home. In the rear view mirror, he caught the concerned look the driver gave him. He sighed. What was everyone's problem with homeless people? Sure, many of them are drug addicts and all types of shady people, but how were you supposed to know if you didn't give any of them the chance to explain their situation.

The ride was silent as well. Kendall felt extremely awkward. How did he end up in Logan Mitchell's limo? And Logan wasn't much better off. How was he going to explain to everyone that he'd invited a homeless teenager to move in with him?

When they arrived at Logan's home, Kendall's eyes were wide. He'd seen some nice places in his lifetime, but never a place like this. A mixture of classic American architecture and modern designs, it was more like a work of art than a house. With its swooping roof held up by tall pillars and its balcony seemingly just floating in midair, it was hard to believe it was even functional.

Logan led him inside and showed him to one of the guest rooms.

"This can be your room from now on," Logan said, taking him into the room. "There's a bathroom through that door, so you can grab a shower or something if you want. I'll bring you some clothes."

"Who says I want to change?" Kendall asked quickly.

"Well uh... I... just... um..." Logan stuttered, trying to think of something to say that wouldn't upset Kendall.

"Logan, calm down. I'm just kidding. I appreciate what you're doing for me. Seriously, you don't have to be paranoid when you talk to me."

"Oh. Ok. Sorry, I just don't want to offend you or anything..."

"No need to worry about that. I'm not the type to be easily offended." Kendall explained with a calm smile. "If you want to say something, you don't have to be scared. Just say it. I don't want you to sensor yourself just because I'm here. It's your home."

"Right. Well, you go shower, and I'll bring some clothes for you to change into for now. Then, I guess I should give you a tour."

"Cool. Thanks."

"No problem." Logan nodded as he exited the room and shut the door behind him. He leaned against the door, exhaling heavily. Had he been blushing the whole time? He lifted a hand to his forehead and felt the beads of sweat that had gathered there. Was he... nervous? About Kendall? Maybe what James said was right. Maybe Kendall did have a thing for him. He had seemed kind of flirtatious, in a sweet, quiet kind of way.

Logan shook his head as he headed across the hall to his own bedroom. He wondered why he'd picked the room right across from his own to give to Kendall when he had so many others to choose from.

He opened his closet and pulled out a grey t-shirt and a pair of blue pajama bottoms. Then he went to his dresser and pulled out a pair of socks. He blushed slightly again as he pulled out a pair of underwear, hoping Kendall was a boxer man.

He grabbed the pile of clothes and took them back to Kendall's room and laid them out on the bed. He heard the shower running in the bathroom. The room began to get a little stuffy as he thought of Kendall standing in the steamy water. Naked.

Running out of the room, he scolded himself. He shouldn't be thinking that way! He'd only just met Kendall. They'd just become friends today. But he had to admit, even through the layers of grime, Kendall had a certain charm. And he was different. He had a better outlook on life than not only most other homeless people, but also people who had homes.

Then Logan thought Kendall might need some other hygiene supplies. He walked to a supply closet that he kept guest wares in. Pulling out a new toothbrush, tube of toothpaste, comb, and a bottle of cologne, he wondered if there was anything else he should get for him.

Deciding that he could just ask Kendall if there was anything else he needed or wanted, he walked back to the bedroom and put the supplies next to the clothes he'd put there earlier. Then he heard the water shut off and he hurried to get out of the room, not wanting to make Kendall uncomfortable.

Logan waited outside for Kendall to come out. He just leaned against the wall patiently. He was going to wait for him downstairs, but he didn't want him to get lost.

When he heard the doorknob jiggle and saw the door pull back a little, he stood straight. He almost gasped when the door was opened fully. There stood Kendall, all cleaned up and wearing Logan's clothes.

"Wow." Logan said before he could stop himself. "You..."

"Not too shabby, am I right?" Kendall said, examining himself.

"Absolutely." Logan could almost feel his jaw touching the floor. His shirt clung to Kendall's skin without constricting him, and his pants hugged his thighs beautifully. His hair was combed back and now that the dirt had been washed out, Logan could see the blonde in it. Mentally slapping himself for staring, Logan began talking again. "Um, would you like a tour now?"

"Sure."

"Follow me." Logan said happily. He showed Kendall the t.v. room and the the kitchen, telling him he could use these rooms whenever he liked and he could help himself to any food or drinks he wanted. He showed him the game room and told him he could play the games but most of them were only fun with more than one person. He showed him the entire house, telling him he could go anywhere he wanted, he could use any room for any reason. Except Logan's room. That was off limits. To everyone. Always.

X

After the tour, the boys sat in the kitchen. Logan had to eat dinner, and of course he would offer some to Kendall if he was still hungry. Plus, he wanted to talk more.

"So, Kendall, I was thinking maybe tomorrow we could go shopping. I could get you some clothes and if there's anything else you want, we can get it."

"You don't have to do that." Kendall said, shocked.

"Too bad. I want to."

"Ok. I never question any good fortune." Kendall smiled.

Logan laughed. "You know, you never did answer my last question. You don't have to if you don't want to, but..."

"No, I don't mind. Just remind me which question that was again?" Kendall said.

"Why are you homeless?"

"Oh yeah." The smile on Kendall's face faltered a bit. "Well, there are a lot of reasons, actually. About a year ago, everything was fine. I lived with my mom and my sister. We had a nice house, and I went to a nice school and everything. I wasn't the best student, but I wasn't the worst either. My dad had passed away a few years earlier, but we'd gotten through it, you know? What else can you do? He wouldn't have wanted us to dwell on it. Anyway, I got fired from my job because I left early one day. My sister was sick and I wanted to be home with her while Mom was at work."

"What's your sister's name?" Logan asked, trying to take the edge off the conversation. He wanted to know Kendall's story, but not if it was too hard to tell.

"Katie. She's adorable. I know a lot of people can't stand their siblings, and we had our rough times, but we got along pretty well. We were really close." Kendall looked like his mind was somewhere else for a moment until he resumed his story. "So, after I got fired, I started taking care of Katie full time so Mom could work more. She wasn't upset or anything, she was actually proud of me for choosing my sister over my job. But then she got laid off. We couldn't afford to live in our house anymore. We moved to an apartment, but we lied and told the landlord that there were only two of us. When they found out there were three, we got evicted. We made it on the streets for a while. My mom was a lot more street wise than I thought. Eventually, Katie got put into foster care because she's young and adorable. But my mom and I had to fend for ourselves. When we tried to stay in a shelter, they told us it was for women and children only. Mom refused to go in at first, but I told her I'd be fine on my own. After a few days, we got permanently separated. And that's how I ended up homeless and alone."

"That's... I'm so sorry that happened to you." Logan said. "But... you're not either of those things anymore."

"True."

"And... maybe I can help you try and find your mom and sister."

"I appreciate the thought, but I don't want to find them." Kendall said, hanging his head.

"You don't?"

"No."

"But... they're your family. You love them."

"Trust me. Wherever Katie is, I know she's being taken care of better than I could take care of her. And my mom, I'm sure she's fine as well. She may have even found a job or a place to live or something. Who knows? Either way, she's better off on her own. If Katie and I were with her, things would end up exactly like they are."

"You shouldn't think that." Logan argued. What happened to positive laid-back Kendall? "I'm sure they'd want you with them regardless of any financial situation."

"It isn't really about the money. I just want them to be living happy lives. And if that means being without them, I'm fine with that."

"Are you?"

Kendall sighed. "No. Of course I'm not. I miss them like crazy. But I'm not ready to face them yet. Maybe someday I'll get out there and find them. But I don't think I could handle it at this point."

"Ok. I can respect that. But if you ever change your mind, I want to help you."

"You're a good friend. Really, I don't know how to thank you for everything you're doing for me."

"You don't have to worry about it, Kendall. I don't want anything in return. I'm not sure why, but... I look at you and I just... I want to help you any way I can."


	7. James Diamond Is Not A Crayon

**Chapter 7 - James Diamond Is Not A Crayon (Posted 8 March 2011)**

**A/N: Has anyone ever read the book "Amber Brown is not a Crayon" by Paula Danziger? I read it when I was a kid. The title is taken from that. Because I felt like it :D And, again, these Jarlos chapters happen during the previous Kogan chapters. **

James had fallen asleep thinking about Carlos. He even dreamed about him. They were on the beach, holding hands, and walking on the beach.

When he woke up, he was still thinking about Carlos. Remembering his smile, his smell, his voice. How his heartbeat sped up more and more the closer they got. How he just wanted to be near Carlos. It made him feel... alive. And he could see that something in Carlos's past was hurting him. He wanted to be the reason that pain went away.

Getting out of bed, he wondered if it was too early to call Carlos. Was he still asleep? Was he getting ready for work? Was he already at work?

But before he could contemplate it much further, his phone was ringing. He looked at the caller ID and sure enough, it was Carlos.

"¿Bueno?" James answered, trying to mimic Carlos's tone.

"Ah, mi amor, you are learning so much." Carlos replied happily.

"Carlos..."

"Wait. I have to tell you something." Carlos interrupted him, but kept his tone polite. "I want to thank you for last night. I had a really nice time and I can't tell you how good it felt to go out with you."

"It was my pleasure." James said sweetly.

"And... thanks for taking me up to my bed. I'm sorry I fell asleep..."

"Don't worry about it. I really didn't mind. You worked all day and then stayed up late. It happens to the best of us."

"I just really appreciate all the nice things you said. And then when you just wanted to sit with me instead of... well... it was a nice change of pace."

"I wouldn't do anything you wouldn't want to do, Carlos."

"I know. You're so... you're a great guy and... and I want to trust you and get to know you... I just hope you can understand that I'm going to need some time for all that to happen."

"I've got plenty of time. Any time you're ready to open up to me or if you just want to talk to me about your day or anything at all, I'll be here, ok?"

"Thank you."

"No problem. You're special, Carlos. Just remember that."

Carlos gave a sad laugh but smiled anyway. "I will. So... when can I see you again?"

"Any time you're free. Logan has his community service, so the band isn't booked for anything major for a while. We can go out again whenever you want."

"Well, I've got interviews and meetings and things the rest of this week and most of the next. But I've got lunch hours free most days. Maybe we could meet up for an hour sometime and grab coffee or something? It isn't much, but..."

"It's perfect." James said, before Carlos could get too down on himself.

"Ok." Carlos said lightly. "Hmm.. what is today? Tuesday? How about... Friday? Around one?"

"Sounds great. Where would you like to meet?"

"There's a café just a few blocks from the office I'll be at that day. Le Café au Soleil."

"Ok. I know that place. I will see you there, Friday at uno."

Carlos chuckled. "You've still got a lot to learn, mi chico lindo."

"Maybe you can teach me."

"We'll see."

"You can call me anytime, you know."

"Sí. Gracias."

"De nada."

"Hasta luego."

"Bye, Carlos." James said quietly as he hung up the phone. He was pretty sure the smile he wore was permanently stuck that way as he just couldn't stop. He had another date with Carlos. Carlos said he wanted to get to know and trust him. And he'd called him Mi Amor. Things were definitely on the right track. He just hoped they stayed that way.


	8. Anytime, Baby

**Chapter 8 - Anytime, Baby (Posted 10 March 2011)**

When Friday rolled around, James was so excited he didn't know what to do. He tried to occupy himself all morning with television or video games. Anything. But nothing could keep his mind off Carlos.

Usually he became annoyed when he spent so much time thinking about someone. But it was different with Carlos. He liked thinking about him. He liked to picture his smile in his head. Or his adorable sleeping face.

Around noon, Logan called.

"Hello!" James yelled, delighted that he had someone to talk to.

"Wow. Someone is in a very good mood." Logan said, amused.

"Yeah. That's what happens when you're getting ready to go out with a guy like Carlos."

"You're going out with him today? I thought he told you he was busy."

"He did. He's giving up his lunch break to be with me."

"That's awesome, James. I'm happy for you, man."

"Thanks. So, how are things going at the kitchen?"

"Ugh. They have me in the back sorting out all the donations and crap. Not that I have anything against volunteering, it's just that I'd rather be doing something that directly impacts these people's lives."

"Yeah. It's too bad they hate you."

"I know." Logan agreed. Really, why would you hate someone who is only trying to help you?

"So, how's your friend?"

"Friend?"

"Yeah, that... Kenneth guy you were talking about last time. The one that has a crush on you."

"Oh, would you knock it off! And his name is Kendall."

"Whatever. Do you ever see him?" James wondered.

"Not really. He comes in and gets his food and then he just leaves. I see him out the window, he just sits on a bench all by himself."

"You watch him?"

"No!"

"Oh my god! Logan, you're a creeper! You're stalking a homeless man!"

"James, stop it." Logan protested loudly. "I am _not_ stalking him. I just feel bad for him. It's probably all my fault that he's alone."

"Why don't you go talk to him?"

"I don't know. He probably hates me."

"I'm sure he doesn't hate you. He's probably waiting for you to notice him out there. I bet he wants in your pants so bad..."

"James, stop it this instant! No one is getting in anyone's pants..."

"That's what you think." James laughed.

"I mean it. He's a nice guy. Maybe I will go talk to him."

"You do that. That way you don't have to stare at him through a window, being all emo like."

"What should I say to him?"

"I don't know. You wanna be this guy's friend, right?"

"Um... yes...?"

"Ok. So, start by asking him how old he is. Just take the conversation from there. Maybe offer to buy him a meal or something. Just do what feels right, Logan."

"I guess." Logan sighed.

"Hey, what color are his eyes?" James asked sneakily.

"They're like this sea green color that..."

"Ah, got you. You've looked into his eyes. You want him."

"I do not!"

"Why? Because he's homeless?"

"No, of course that's not it..."

"Look, he's good looking, and nice, and you _like_ him. You said all that yourself. I think you're making a good decision by trying to be his friend. But if it turns into more, you shouldn't let his homelessness stop you."

"I wouldn't, James. You know I'm not that kind of person."

"I do. But he doesn't."

"I suppose I have to show him, then?" Logan wondered aloud, not really intending on anyone hearing that.

"Go for it, dude."

"Right. Have a good time on your date, James."

"You too."

"Why you..."

James laughed and hung up before he could hear what Logan was going to call him. In all honesty, he was glad Logan was focusing on something other than the band and his education on the side. Sure, he knew planning for the future was good, but you can't plan ahead so much that you miss out on the time you have right now. If Logan had a friend in this homeless boy, he was glad. Sometimes he worried about Logan's social life. He didn't have many friends besides James.

Even though he cared about Logan, his thoughts faded back to Carlos. He felt like he knew him, like they'd been together for years. But there was still so much he needed to know. Where did he grow up? What kind of music is his favorite? What color makes him happy? Who had hurt him? Why did he think so little of himself?

Then James wondered something else. How old is he? James himself was only eighteen. But Carlos, even though he was a little on the short side, appeared a little older. And he was in a career that required years of education. James usually had a strict No Older Guys policy, he liked to be the older one. It wasn't because he didn't _want_ an older guy, it was just that he was afraid of them. They all expected him to act more mature and they wouldn't let him make any decisions while he was with them. But Carlos had been so laid back about it. He knew James was only eighteen, yet he hadn't treated him like he was beneath him. He'd even given him alcohol.

Those weren't the only reasons he liked Carlos, of course. He was also really sweet. And adorable. And so much more.

X

James arrived at the café ten minutes before one. He stood outside and waited for Carlos. After ten minutes passed, he began to grow even more anxious. But when ten more minutes passed, he was losing hope. Carlos had said one o'clock, hadn't he? He'd said Friday? At Le Café au Soleil? James knew he was correct, he wouldn't forget. Not something this important.

As another ten minutes ticked by, James was worried. He knew Carlos wanted to see him. He was pretty sure he wasn't being stood up, so he didn't want to leave in case he showed. But what if something happened to him? What if he was in trouble?

As James's thoughts became increasingly worried, he saw a figure running up the sidewalk.

"James!" the person called out. James could spot that smile a mile away. As Carlos came closer and closer, James walked to meet him. "James, I'm so sorry I'm late."

"It's fine. I'm just glad you're here now. I thought maybe something was wrong..."

"You were worried about me?" Carlos panted.

"Yeah."

"James..." Carlos cooed as he threw his arms around James's midsection, practically squishing him. "That is the sweetest thing I've ever heard. I'm sorry I made you worry, but... it's kind of nice to know you were concerned. I know that sounds silly..."

"It's not silly." James laughed as he accepted Carlos's hug.

Carlos smiled as he released James. "I'm really sorry I'm so late. They kept me in the session after my break started and then my car wouldn't start. And I didn't want you to think I wasn't coming so I was going to call you but I realized I didn't have your cell phone number so I ran all the way here to..."

"Ssh, Carlos. It's fine. You're here now."

"That's right. I am. Let's go in."

James walked aside of Carlos and opened the doors to the café for him. They were sat across from each other at a tiny little table.

A waitress took their orders as she chewed loudly on some bubble gum. "Are the checks separate or together."

"Just put it all on my tab." Carlos said.

The waitress nodded and walked away.

"You run a tab here?" James asked, intrigued.

"Yeah. I do a lot of work in this area, so I come here a lot."

"Good to know." James said with a smirk.

Carlos's eyes twinkled. "I usually come alone. We went to your spot last time. So I thought we should come to mine next."

"Cool." James was speechless. He meant that much to Carlos? "Carlos... I hope you don't mind me asking... and this isn't going to change anything, but... how old are you?"

"Oh," Carlos fidgeted, "I'm... uh... twenty."

"That's it?"

"Yes. Why, do I look older than that?"

"No, that's not it." James said, leaning over the table a little. "I was just wondering. How long have you been in journalism?"

"About two years."

"How... is that possible? Don't you have to go to college for that?"

Carlos lowered his gaze. "Well... usually you do. But I didn't. I didn't even finish high school." He was starting to look uncomfortable.

"Oh... if you don't wanna talk about it..."

"No... I do, James. I want to tell you..."

James reached across the table and grabbed Carlos's hand, holding it gently. "You can tell me anything."

Carlos looked up, and James swore he saw a glimmer of a smile behind the tiny tears that were streaming down his face. Carlos's hand squeezed a little harder around James's.

"I dropped out when I was sixteen. There was... this boy. He was my first boyfriend. I'd just... come out of the closet and we were always together. But my parents didn't like him one bit. And I fought them every step of the way because I thought I was in love with him. I... I thought he was in love with me, too. Anyway, when my parents told me I wasn't allowed to see him anymore, we ran away."

"Carlos, I can see that this is hard for you." James said. He scooted his chair around and sat next to him and used a napkin to wipe the tears off his face. Their backs were to the customers, so they didn't have to worry about anyone seeing him cry. "I'm so glad you want to talk to me and I want to hear more. So why don't we wait until we can be somewhere more private. That way you'll be more comfortable."

"Ok." Carlos's lips finally twitched into a smile. "Thanks, James. I do want to tell you about... everything."

"I know. That means a lot to me."

"Oh, our food is here." Carlos used the back of his hand to smear away the remaining tears.

They ate through light conversation, nothing that was difficult to talk about.

When they left the café, James remembered that Carlos had jogged all the way there.

"Say, Carlos... would you like a ride back to wherever you're going."

"That would be great." Carlos said, sounding relieved.

"Good." James smiled. That meant he had at least a few more minutes before they had to part.

They continued their chatter as Carlos occasionally gave directions to James.

When they arrived, James was almost sad. "Well, here you are."

"Yeah. Thanks again, James. I was so excited to see you..." He gave a shy smile before leaning over and pecking James on the lips. "I like you a lot, and I can't wait till we see each other again."

"I like you too, Carlos." James said.

"I'll call you."

"I'll be waiting."


	9. The Man With The Plan

**Chapter 9 - The Man With The Plan (Posted 11 March 2011)**

**A/N: I'm sorry this story isn't that good. I know I said it was Kogan and it seems like I'm focusing more on Jarlos, but that's just because that's how it came out. It will get to Kogan, it's not like I'm abandoning that part of a story. I planned on that taking a little longer to get to because I didn't want to rush it (I hate when it feels rushed) so I threw the Jarlos in there to make it less boring until I got to the good stuff. But I guess I shouldn't have done that and I just fail as a writer. The Kogan comes now, btw, so you don't have to wait any more.**

"What do you want to do today?" Logan asked as he sat in the kitchen eating breakfast with Kendall. It had been about two weeks since Kendall starting living with him. He hadn't regretted it once. They'd spent a lot of time talking and getting to be good friends. Kendall liked to watch television. A lot. He'd missed out on it for so long. He liked the game room and the pool as well. They hadn't left the house except once to go shopping for clothes and things for Kendall, and even then Logan had worn a disguise.

"I don't know. What do _you_ want to do?" Kendall dipped his toast into the dippy part of his eggs.

"Me?"

"Yeah. Since we met, we've been talking what I want to talk about, doing what I want to do, eating what I want to eat. What about you? You're here as well."

"I know. But... I just want you be happy here... I don't want you to feel like I'm some kind of evil landlord or something. I want you to think of me as your friend. This is your home just as much as it is mine."

"Believe me, I could never see you as evil. Not after bringing me into your home without asking anything in return. I don't see why the people I used to hang around with hate famous people so much. It isn't your fault we're homeless any more than it's our fault you're famous, you know?"

"You say the most profound things sometimes. I wouldn't expect someone our age to think like that..." Logan said, staring at him.

"Well, when you spend as much time alone as I have, you tend to be extremely introspective and thoughtful. With no other form of entertainment, my imagination ran wild." Kendall raised his eyebrows.

"I like that about you. The imagination, I mean."

"I like that about me too." Kendall chuckled. "I think that if I wouldn't have been homeless, I wouldn't be me, you know? That's why I never complained about my status. I mean, it wasn't good, but what could I do?"

"I know what you mean." Logan said. Though he'd never really experienced it the same way he had, Logan knew what Kendall was talking about.

"And if I never would have gotten separated from my mom, I wouldn't have met you."

"True, but you wouldn't have needed me either."

"That's where you're wrong."

Logan blushed. He'd been getting these vibes from Kendall since he met him. But he never made a move. How could he be sure if he was interested if he never came out and expressed his interest?

Taking a silent deep breath to make the blush go away, Logan tried desperately to calm himself. His intentions were innocent, but sometimes it was just too hard to control his body. Whenever Kendall would smile or wink at him or breathe on him, his hormones took over and he felt the excitement growing within him. But he always squelched it before it became obvious. He didn't want Kendall to think he'd brought him here in hopes of getting him into bed.

That isn't to say he hadn't thought about it a couple times. And a dream featuring Kendall as the star may have led him to a sticky morning. But he didn't want to have sex with Kendall. Not until he was sure he might be interested in more than just that.

"You're staring." Kendall said lightly.

"Sorry." Logan coughed. He hadn't realized.

"Hey, Logan," Kendall said seriously, "can I ask you something kind of... weird?"

"Um... sure?"

"What do you think of me?"

"What?"

"Well... do you like me? I mean, am I appealing? I'm not asking if you think I'm good looking or anything... I just want to know, is there something wrong with me?"

"What? Why would you ask a question like that all of a sudden?"

"It's just that... well, I don't know..." Kendall's voice faded out.

"Um..." Logan watched as Kendall seemed to be confused. "If it it helps... I think you're very handsome..."

"You do?" Kendall looked relieved.

"I do."

"So... why..." Kendall began to ask a question when a loud ringing sound vibrated throughout the house. The doorbell.

"Oh. Hold that thought, that could be a package I'm expecting. I'll be right back and we can talk more, ok?"

"Ok." Kendall said.

Logan smiled and skipped to his front door. He opened it expecting to be greeted by the FedEx man, but was instead surprised to see James standing on his doorstep.

"James? What are you doing here?"

James laughed. "Is that any way to greet your best friend?"

"Sorry, I just... now isn't a good time."

Kendall was still at his seat in the kitchen. He could hear the conversation between Logan and his bandmate. The rooms may have been very far apart, but the largeness of the house carried sounds easily.

James barged in. "Too bad, I drove all the way here so we could hang out. You spend all your time moping around your house and then doing bookwork at that soup kitchen, and I spend all my time waiting around until my daily lunch dates with Carlos. We haven't spoken in days, and it's been even longer since we've seen each other. We need to reconnect, man."

"James... now _really_ isn't a good time. I'm... preoccupied."

"With what?"

"Um..."

Kendall felt bad for listening. Even though Logan made a point of reminding him several times throughout the day that this was both their homes, he still felt like an intruder at times. And hearing their conversation made it even worse. He knew Logan was afraid of people finding out he was living there. But was it really because he was worried, or was he ashamed? Was he embarrassed? If so, Kendall didn't want to be a part of that. He'd rather be back on the streets than make Logan uncomfortable.

But he liked it there. He liked spending time with Logan and sleeping in a bed. And he did really feel like Logan was his friend, so he thought maybe he just needed time to feel ready to let others know about him. He tiptoed out of the kitchen and walked slowly up the back staircase. He made it into his room and sat on his bed, deciding he'd just hide there until James left.

"Spit it out, Logan." James said.

"I have a... guest?" Logan didn't really know what to say. Kendall wasn't a guest, he was more than just a guest. But how was he supposed to put it into words?

"Who?"

"Hmm... I think it's time you meet him, actually... follow me, he's in the kitchen."

"Oh, it's a he? Is Logan getting a little love?"

"Hah. No. It's not like that." Logan walked James into his kitchen, which was empty. "Where'd he go?"

"Just tell me who it is." James insisted, even though he had a guess. Logan continued looking throughout the house without answering James. "It's him, isn't it? That homeless guy you creep on."

"I don't creep on him!" Logan protested. "He... he lives with me."

James's eyes widened. "He lives with you? Wow, you move fast!"

"Come on, it's not like that. I just... I couldn't let him live on the streets, eating stale food and sleeping in the rain while I come home to this mansion every night. So I let him move in with me. We're friends."

"Has he made a pass at you yet?"

"No. I don't... think so anyway. I'm not sure, exactly..."

"How can you not be sure?" James asked. "Does he flirt with you? Does he smile a lot? Does he say things about you? Does he look at you funny? Does he ask you weird questions? Does he seem nervous sometimes?"

"...Yes. He does all of that but..."

"But nothing." James laughed and patted Logan on the back. "He likes you, but for some reason he's waiting for you to make the first move."

"I don't know... you know I'm not good with things like this. I always mess it up..."

"Logan, it's only a mistake if the person doesn't really like you. If they like you, they're not gonna give up just because you say the wrong thing or make a wrong move. They'll expect you to try again so eventually you can get it right."

"I'm just not sure... what if he doesn't really like me and he's just a very open person who gets nervous sometimes?"

"You'll never know unless you try."

"I don't want him to feel like that's the only reason I brought him here..." Logan admitted.

"Hey, what did you say to me when I was afraid Carlos would think the only reason I wanted to go out with him was because he was a reporter? Just tell him that. Just tell him you still want to be his friend even if he isn't interested in anything more than that."

"I guess that's the only option." Logan said.

"No, your other option is to never say anything and always be left wondering what could have been."

Logan sighed. "You're right."

"So you're finally admitting you're hot for him?"

"I am not _hot_ for him, you pig." Logan teased. "I mean, he is hot, but that's not the point. I like having him here with me. He's really good company and I find myself not even wanting to leave the house because I love spending time with him. He's got some kind of hold on me..."

"I know what that's like." James smiled.

"Things are getting pretty serious with you and Carlos, I take it."

"Yeah. I mean, he still hasn't told me everything, but we're waiting until we can talk in private. He has some time off this weekend so I think I'm going to have him over for dinner at my house or something. He says there's still a lot to tell me, so, you know... I want to make sure he trusts me enough. I don't want to let him down."

"Hey, if you need any help, just let me know."

"Thanks, man." James said. "Now, let me meet this Kendall guy."

"Hey," Logan said as they walked up the steps, "you remembered his name."

"Yeah, I always did, I just pretended to forget so I could tease you about him."

"Why do I not believe you?" Logan asked sarcastically.

James laughed as well, but went on to explain, "I mean it. He's important to you, of course I remembered his name."

Logan shook his head, but was kind of glad James was such a caring friend.

Kendall was sitting cross-legged on his bed, reading one of the books Logan had bought for him on their shopping trip. He could hear voices approaching and suddenly wondered why they were there.

"This is his room..." Logan started.

James interrupted him. "Right across from yours, I see."

"Lay off, James, he'll hear you. I hope he's in here." Logan pushed the door open and was delighted to see Kendall sitting, happily enjoying a novel. "James, wait here. I'm gonna talk to him before I introduce you."

"Do I have to?"

"Yes." Logan went into the room and shut the door behind him. He sat next to Kendall and read over his shoulder for a few seconds. "What's up?"

"Not much. Just reading."

"I see that. But why? We were in the middle of breakfast." Logan continued. He knew there was more to it than that.

"I heard your friend come in and I thought you wouldn't want me around, so I..."

"Why wouldn't I want you around?"

"Because."

"That's not a reason, Kendall. Come on," he put an arm around his shoulder, "something is bugging you. What is it?"

"It's nothing."

"It's not nothing. Tell me what it is so I can help you."

"Why haven't we done anything outside the house?"

"What? We went shopping, remember?" Logan said, not getting the point.

"Yeah, once. And you wore a disguise."

"Of course. Could you imagine what would happen if a fan spotted me? We'd be attacked!"

"So... it's not because you don't want to be seen with a homeless person?"

"What? Of course that's not it!" Logan said, feeling guilty. "I'm sorry... it does look like that, doesn't it? But I swear, that's not it at all. You're my friend, Kendall. And how many times do I have to tell you, you're not homeless anymore, not that it would make a difference to me if you were. I just... didn't feel like we had to go anywhere because we were having a good time here, getting to know each other."

"Really?" Kendall asked, a smile reaching his lips at last.

"Really." Logan said, hugging him. "Now, come on. James is out in the hallway and I want him to meet you."

"You do?"

"Yeah. The most important people in my life should know each other, shouldn't they?" Logan asked, hoping some of his feelings came through in the statement.

Kendall couldn't help but broaden his smile at Logan's words. _I'm that important to him?_

"Sure." Kendall agreed.

"Good." Logan said. Without thinking, he grabbed Kendall's hand and pulled him off the bed. Once he realized it, he was terrified, but not enough to let go. He kept hold as they walked to the door. He opened it and pulled Kendall through.

Kendall looked at James. He knew who it was immediately. James Diamond was the other member of Big Time Rush, his favorite band.

James extended his hand and gave a warm smile. "You must be Kendall."

"You must be James. It's nice to meet you."

"And you. Logan has told me a lot about you."

"I hope he's told you good things."

"Of course." Logan confirmed. "There aren't any bad things to tell."

Kendall glanced at him. _Am I reading him right? He can't be hitting on me... can he?_

"So," James said, even though he felt bad for interrupting the moment, "now that we all know each other, who's up for some Wii?"


	10. The Check Up

**Chapter 10 - The Check Up (Posted 12 March 2011)**

"Kendall, come out of your room right now!" Logan pleaded from out in the hallway. "The doctor is going to be here any minute."

"That's why I'm in here." Kendall answered. "I hate doctors."

"Kendall you need a check up. You've been on the streets for a year, I want to make sure you're healthy,"

"I feel just fine, thank you."

"There's no harm in making sure."

"Please don't make me see a doctor." Kendall begged.

Logan was worried. Kendall had never protested anything before. He was always grateful and willing to accept. Logan thought Kendall would appreciate him having the doctor make a house call just to give him a check up. "You have to. What if you have some kind of illness that doesn't show any symptoms? I don't want to wait until it's too late..."

"I thought _you_ were studying to be a doctor."

"I am, but I'm still in general courses, I haven't even started my medical training yet. Please, Kendall. Do this for me."

Kendall hesitated. Logan knew that last part would get him. He hated to use it against him, but he was worried about him.

"I can't."

"Why not?" Logan asked calmly.

"I'm... I'm afraid..."

"What?" Now Logan really felt bad.

"I'm scared. Doctors scare me, ok? They have since I was a kid and... I guess I never outgrew it..."

"But... you were willing to let me be your doctor."

"That's because I trust you. I trust you with my life, Logan. I took a chance and moved in with you... and you don't know how scary that was. But there was just something... I just knew I could trust you..."

"I'm glad you trust me." Logan smiled to himself. "Look, Kendall... I'd never let anything bad happen to you. This doctor isn't going to hurt you. How about you just meet her, alright? If she makes you uncomfortable, I'll have her leave. But I promise she's not going to hurt you."

"Will you be there with me?"

"If you want me there, then yes." Logan waited for a response. He heard a soft thud and then the door opened, revealing Kendall and his tear stained face. "Oh, Kendall," Logan said sadly. He couldn't fight the compulsion he had to hug him. He threw his arms around him and squeezed him comfortingly. "Don't cry. I'll stay right there with you. Everything is gonna be fine, I promise."

Kendall didn't say anything, just held Logan tighter.

The doorbell rang and Logan leaned out of the hug. "That'll be the doctor." He lifted a hand and wiped Kendall's tears away gently. "Go wash your face and then come downstairs, ok?"

Kendall nodded, looking away.

"Hey," Logan said softly as he turned Kendall's head back to face him, "I... I hope you know I'm just doing this because I care about you."

"You do?"

"Of course I do." Logan laughed a little. "You've become one of my best friends, Kendall. I care about you a lot."

"Thanks. I care about you too..."

Logan smiled and patted Kendall's shoulder. "I know. Now, I'm going to let Dr. Merna in before she gets angry. You come down when you're ready."

"Ok."

Logan went down and let the doctor into the living room while Kendall went into his bathroom and washed his face. He was so scared, but he fought really hard to keep from crying again. When he was sure he could handle it, and after reminding himself about a hundred times that Logan would be there with him, he went down to meet the doctor.

"There he is." Logan said when he spotted Kendall coming down the steps. "Kendall, this is Dr. Merna, she's going just going to check you out and make sure everything is ok."

"Hello." Kendall said.

"Hello." the doctor said sweetly. "I understand you're a little nervous. But I'm trained to handle any medical situation and I won't hurt you. If at any time you feel you need to stop and take a break, just let me know. My job isn't to make you uncomfortable."

"Ok."

Kendall let the doctor perform some tests and prod around his body. She was really gentle and always told him what she was going to do so he didn't get freaked out. They only needed to take a break once; he'd started to feel just a little claustrophobic, but after a few minutes he was fine and they continued with the check up.

"You are amazingly healthy for someone who spent so much time on the streets." the doctor commented as they were nearing the end.

"I did my best to take care of myself." Kendall said.

"That's good. Ok, now I'm just going to give you some immunization shots."

"Shots?" Kendall asked, worried.

"Are you afraid of needles?" the doctor asked cautiously.

"A little..."

"Well, they're not very big, and it only stings for a second..."

"Ok..." Kendall did his best to keep his cool, but he was starting to shake.

Logan noticed and grabbed Kendall's hand. Kendall looked up at him and saw the encouraging smile he wore. He relaxed a little, but he was still a bit scared.

"Kendall, it's going to be fine. If anything happens, I'm right here."

"Thanks." Kendall said, and he took a deep breath to stop the shaking.

The doctor smiled at them. "I'll give you the biggest one first so it's out of the way. Then the last two are teeny tiny little needles, so you won't feel much." She gave Kendall the shots and was proud that he was able to take them without squirming. "There you go, that wasn't so bad, was it?"

"No." Kendall said with a little laugh.

"Well, looks like we're done here." Dr, Merna said happily to Kendall. "I'll have the tuberculosis test results for you in about a week, so I'll call you. I'm pretty sure they'll be negative given his incredible health, but just to be safe. And the shots might make you a little... wacky." Then she turned to Logan. "You might want to keep an eye on him. The wooziness should wear off in a couple hours, but until then, his senses might be a little off balance and he might feel indestructible."

"So basically he feels high right now?" Logan asked, concerned.

"Yeah, I guess that's the best way to describe it. Just stay with him for about... three hours. It should be worn off by then."

"Got it. Thanks for coming out here, doc."

"Oh it was no trouble. He was a lot easier to handle than some of my other patients who haven't been to a doctor in a while. I'll have the bill sent to your accountant."

"Ok." Logan agreed as he walked the doctor out. He went back to Kendall and sat next to him on the sofa. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired. My head feels kind of... fuzzy."

"Do you want to go back to bed for a while?"

"No."

"Kendall, if you're tired you should rest." Logan insisted.

"I don't want to. Want to stay here with you."

Logan looked into Kendall's eyes. Was he finally making a move? Or was it the drugs talking? "We can spend more time together _after_ you get some rest. Come on." He stood and pulled Kendall up.

"Woah..." Kendall stumbled.

Logan steadied him. "Come on, you can lean against me while you walk. Here, wrap your arm around me like this." He put Kendall's arm around his shoulder and wrapped one of his own arms around Kendall's waist. He walked him to the steps and told him when he had to step up, and he caught him each time he stumbled.

He took Kendall to his room and made him lay down.

"Logan." Kendall said sleepily.

"Yes?"

"Will you stay with me?"

"Stay?" Logan asked.

"Yeah. Please? I hate being alone."

"What?" Logan asked. "You've never mentioned that before." Logan suddenly felt really guilty. He left Kendall alone every night. Not that he'd wanted to, but he had to go to the soup kitchen every night to work off his community service. And Kendall had to sleep alone.

"I didn't want to bother you."

Logan sat on the side of the bed. "It wouldn't have bothered me. I don't know what I could do... but... you still should have said something."

"It doesn't really matter..."

"Yes it does. If you don't like something I'm doing, I want to know about it. I want to give you anything you want, Kendall."

"I want you to stay with me."

"Ok." Logan turned so he could lay down next to Kendall. "I'll stay."

"Good."

"But what about when I leave to do my community service? Do you want me to find someone to be here with you?"

"I don't want to be with anyone else."

"Kendall..."

"Don't stop talking. I love your voice."

"My voice?" Logan asked sheepishly.

"Mmhmm. It's so nice. I remember the first time I heard it..."

"That night at the soup kitchen?"

"No. On the radio. I heard you singing and I just... I had to know who you were. Logan Mitchell. And I knew there was no chance of meeting you, because you were famous and I was just one of your millions of fans. And then I couldn't hear you anymore once I became homeless. But then you were there... you were serving your time at my kitchen. It was too good to be true. And now... somehow you're my friend and I'm living in your house and it all feels like a dream. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up in a bus terminal somewhere and none of this really happened."

"Wow." Logan said, conflicted. "Well, this is really happening, Kendall. I can guarantee that. And you don't have to be afraid of anything anymore. Now that you're with me, you're safe. I'll protect you from everything. No more sleeping outside or wondering when your next meal is. You don't have to worry. I'm taking care of you."

"That's why it's so scary. I don't want to lose this. I don't know what I'd do if..."

"If what, Kendall?"

"If you ever decided you didn't want me anymore."

"That's never going to happen."

"How do you know? You don't know everything about me, what if you find out something you don't like? What if you just get tired of having me around? What if all of a sudden you get grossed out that you let a homeless guy into your house?"

"Kendall, slow down." Logan rubbed Kendall's side. "I knew what I was doing and I have never once regretted bringing you into my house. I love having you around and I... I like you too much to let anything get in the way of being with you."

"How much do you like me?" Kendall asked quietly.

"Very much."

"The regular kind of like? Or the special kind of like?"

Logan was silent for a moment. How was he supposed to answer that? He wasn't even really sure. But Kendall was waiting for a response, and probably feeling more vulnerable the longer Logan went without giving him one. "Both."

Kendall smiled. "I thought so." He didn't know if it was the medicine inhibiting his good senses or if it was just too much to take at this point, but he lost control. He stretched a hand out and pulled Logan closer until there was less than a centimeter between their lips.

"So," Logan's voice cracked, "what is it that I don't know about you that you're so worried about?"

"I like you too." Finally, Kendall pushed forward and closed the space between them. He'd wanted to kiss logan for so long. He'd fantasized about it since he heard him sing. And now that he knew him, his feelings were that much stronger. And feeling Logan kiss him back was something he never even dreamed of.

When the kiss ended, Logan saw that Kendall's eyes were closed. He wrapped his arms around Kendall and let him snuggle against him. "Get some sleep, Kendall. I'll still be here when you wake up."

"You'd better be."


	11. The Full Story

**Chapter 11 - The Full Story (Posted 14 March 2011)**

**A/N: Now for some Jarlos, but only one chapter instead of two this time. Next few chapters will be Kogan and then I think the rest of the story is going to bring the two together.**

James was currently sitting on his sofa with his arm around Carlos. They'd just had dinner, which James had prepared completely from scratch, and were now enjoying some ice cream as dessert.

"Moose Tracks is my favorite ice cream." Carlos said as he took a bite.

"I know, that's why I bought it." James said sweetly.

"You are so good to me."

"I try my best."

Carlos smiled and leaned over to kiss him, tasting the ice cream still on his lips. "You know, James, I think we're gonna be together for a long time."

"I sure hope so."

"I think it's time for me to tell you more about my life... unless you don't want to hear it..."

"Of course I want to hear it, Carlos." James said and brought him closer so they were leaning against each other. "I told you, you can tell me anything."

Carlos looked at James and found the strength he was looking for in those big, beautiful eyes. He took a deep breath and began. "When I was fifteen, I met Xavier. He wasn't really my type, he had sort of a darker personality and he was too serious sometimes, but I hung out with him because people thought he was cool. And then they thought I was cool. People didn't like me very much... so I liked that feeling, you know? Everyone wanted me. I knew they were all shallow, but I didn't care. They liked me, and that was all that mattered."

"How could anyone not like you?" James was greatly confused. Carlos was fun and outgoing and, even though he was afraid to get involved in meaningful relationships, he always just did his own thing. He didn't let anyone else influence him.

"I actually don't know the answer to that. Probably because there were a lot of bad people in that area, and of course my dad was a police officer so he was always busting them."

"That's not your fault."

"I know, but that's how the people there saw it. So anyway, one day Xavier just asked me if I'd ever thought about being with a boy. The truth was I'd known I was gay for a long time, I just wondered how he knew I was gay. I was always acting tough and hitting on girls I knew I could never get and would never really want. But there he was, staring at me like he already knew the answer before he asked the question."

"What did you say?"

"I begged him not to tell anyone. I knew there was no use denying it, he knew for sure. I just didn't want him spreading it around. But he told me it was okay and that he was gay too. And from there we were inseparable."

"This doesn't seem so bad so far."

"Just wait. It gets bad." Carlos grabbed James's hand and squeezed it. James squeezed back, doing his best to let him know he was right there, and nothing in his past could hurt him anymore. "So, the time came when I was ready to come out to my parents. He'd already come out to his and I was introduced to his family. They were pretty nice but they warned me that their son had some issues. Of course I didn't know what they meant and I didn't really care. After all, he'd told me he loved me and I'd said it back."

"Did you really love him?"

"No. I thought I did... at the time. But even now I realize I was lying to myself the whole time. He was the only person who would have me, so I wanted to love him. And it was nice for a while. Until I wanted to come out. He told me that I wasn't allowed to because I was his and I had to ask his permission for something like that. And then... well, that was the first time he hit me."

"He hit you?"

"Yeah."

James felt anger begin to build up inside him. And then disgust. Who did he think he was? How dare he hit Carlos! Especially after he claimed to love him. "What did you do?"

"What do you think? I hit him back! And I hated myself for it. I felt so terrible. I'm not a violent person. But when it comes to defending myself, I'm not against it. Anyway I apologized about a hundred times right then and there and I just kept crying. And then he started crying and promising that he would never do that again and that he loved me and he didn't want to hurt me. I didn't know what to do. I'd seen shows about battered wives and things, and even though I felt funny comparing myself to a wife I was sort of scared. Because I knew that it could happen again. But I also knew that if I loved Xavier I had to give him another chance. So I did."

"Did it stop?"

"No. Every day, I'd ask him if we could tell my parents, and then he'd hit me. Afterwards he'd always start crying and he'd hug me and promise it wouldn't happen anymore. And I believed him, so I kept asking, and he kept hitting me. At first they were just smacks, they hurt but they didn't do any damage. Not physically, anyway. But then they progressed to punches. And I let it turn into full on beatings before I decided to do something about it. One day I went to his house and I told him that it was over and that he didn't own me and I was gonna tell my parents when I was good and ready, with or without him."

"Let me guess, he hit you again."

Carlos chuckled darkly before he started crying. "I wish. He punched me and kicked me until I was lying on the ground barely breathing. But it didn't stop there. His dad was a mechanic so there were lots of tools lying around the house. He grabbed this huge wrench... and..."

"Oh, Carlos." James felt himself begin to cry as well. He pulled Carlos even closer and hugged him tighter than he'd ever hugged anyone. He rubbed the poor boy's back and kissed his head. "You don't have to say any more..."

"Yes I do. I've let these memories fester in my head all these years. I've dated, but I've never let anyone in enough to help me get over the pain. I'm letting you in, James... and I need you to know this about me. I... I'm pretty sure I'm falling in love with you and I don't want a repeat of last time. I know you're not going to hurt me, but I can't shake this fear if I don't trust you enough to tell you about all this. You have to understand everything."

"Ok." James said, smiling though his tears. "I'll do whatever you need me to do, Carlos. If it helps, I think I'm falling in love with you too."

"It does help. A lot."

"Good. Did he ever... you know... force... anything?"

"No. Well, not exactly. I mean, I didn't want... I never thought I would matter to anyone that way, you know, I mean... I never... I figured I wasn't important enough to expect anyone else to want me that way, so I never protested. To anyone, really, until I realized there had to be someone out there who wouldn't just automatically expect it from me."

"You deserve so much better than that, Carlos..."

"I know, believe me, I know. But back then, no matter what anyone told me, no matter how they tried to cheer me up... no one wanted me for more than a night or two..."

"I hope you know you mean far more than that to me..."

"I do. We've been on so many dates and you haven't made me uncomfortable, not even once the whole time I've known you. You're letting me move at my own pace and that's never happened before. And part of me expects that one day I'll find out this was all just part of a huge plan to get me into bed but the rest of me knows that you wouldn't do that and that you mean everything you've ever said to me... and I know that sounds paranoid but I'm so afraid of getting hurt again it just... it clouds my perception of everything. But here you are making me feel like... like everything is going to be ok for us and I've _never_ felt that before. It's so different and that makes it scary in its own way but... somehow you make that less scary too, if that makes any sense..."

"It makes perfect sense." James caressed Carlos's cheek gently, feeling his slightly tear-dampened skin. "No one has ever treated you like the amazing person you are. Now that I'm here you can see yourself more clearly and you know that this isn't a trick because you're too good for that. I don't know the full story yet but since the first time you mentioned you were hurt before, I've wanted to make sure you feel as special as you are. I hate that you had to go through any pain at all, but I admire you for being strong. And I admire you for being willing to take a chance on me even after you've suffered so much. I can be anything you need or want me to be, Carlos. And any time you feel scared, just remember that my goal is to take your pain away, not give you more."

"You're doing a good job so far."

"I'll keep doing it until the end of days if I have to."

"Ok. I think I'm ready to go on." Carlos said and felt James nod in encouragement. "Well, you can pretty much guess what he did with the wrench. I woke up two days later in a hospital bed. My parents were on either side of me, looking down with so much pity. But there was something else. They looked... angry. And I was scared. What did I do? Well, I found out. After Xavier beat me, his mom walked in and saw me lying on the floor and called for an ambulance. And while that was happening, Xavier was at my house telling my parents that I'm gay."

"Oh my god. That's..."

"It was bad. I'd wanted to do it on my terms, and explain everything to them, I wanted to tell them I was still the same son I'd always had been and that I loved them no matter what they thought of me. But no. He went and ruined it for me. Because I'd broken up with him."

"What did your parents say?"

"They said that they were disappointed in me. They weren't upset that I was gay, they were upset that I never talked to them about it. And they couldn't believe I was stupid enough to get involved with someone like Xavier and to keep letting him beat me. I knew they were right. But when they left and Xavier came in the room, all teary and snotty, I just... I felt bad for him, you know? No one would help him. He had some emotional issues that no one would talk him through and I felt like... I was the only one helping him."

"By letting him beat you up?"

"Yeah." Carlos said sadly. "I forgave him. But I was still mad that he told my parents. But he apologized and said that the only reason he did that was because he was sorry he hurt me. He knew I wanted to tell them so he told them for me. Deep down in my heart I knew he was lying, I knew he really told them so he could try and hurt me, but I wanted to believe him so bad. So I did. Obviously, my parents objected. They wanted me to find a good guy who would protect me and who would never raise a hand against me and would just love me as much as I loved him. But I was... I was too afraid I'd never find anyone like that. I mean, I had no friends, and the only boyfriend I'd ever had was beating me constantly and I just didn't see why anyone would want me. So I defied them and I stayed with him. And... you know this part... when they told me I wasn't ever allowed to see him again, we ran away."

"I wish I would have been there then."

Carlos smiled. "I do too. But we can't change it. I'm just glad I have you now."

"Is this helping? Telling me this?"

"Yes. It feels good to get it all off my chest."

"Good. I know it's hurting you to tell me... and it's hurting me to listen to what you went through... but I'm so happy you're letting me see this part of your life..."

"I'm happy too. To have finally found someone like you, James... it feels amazing."

"Is there more?"

"Yeah. The rest isn't so bad. We stayed with some people that Xavier knew, bouncing from apartments to basements to tour vans. We always got kicked out because he was too loud and violent. The beatings continued, sometimes happening two or three times a day even. And one day I just... decided I didn't want to live like that anymore. I knew I was better than that and that I deserved more even if I was never gonna find it. I would rather be alone than with someone like him. So I waited until he was asleep one night, and I left."

"You just... left?"

"Yeah. I didn't want to talk to him. I knew that if I did, I'd never leave. And I went back to my parents and they were so happy to see me. They were so proud. But I'd missed a whole year of school by then. And I didn't want to go back. But my mom had some connections, and got me a paid internship at a local newspaper. And I just worked my way up. And for someone who didn't even finish high school, I'm pretty good at my job, which is why most employers overlook my lack of education."

"What happened to Xavier?"

"Well... it's kind of sad. I mean, I never wanted to see him again and I hated what he did to me but... I'd always hoped he'd get some help and actually find someone. But he ended up drowning. No one knows if it was an accident or suicide or if someone was trying to off him. I was even considered as a suspect but his parents stepped up and said no way it was me. I'm very grateful to them for that... But that's pretty much it for my story. I've gone out on a lot of dates since then. And some of them have been pranks, which didn't help with my self-esteem too much after what I'd been through. You know, someone dares someone to ask out the Latino in the office. Or they bet that he's just a whore who'll get it on with anyone. That sort of thing. And eventually I just stopped. I'd flirt and even take numbers and stuff, but I was never serious about any of it."

"Until you met me."

"Yep. I looked at you and you just seemed... different. Genuinely interested. And then when you called me... I was so happy I almost pissed my pants."

James laughed. "You don't know how nervous I was about calling you."

"But I'm so glad you did."

"So am I."


	12. Waking Dreams

**Chapter 12 - Waking Dreams (Posted 18 March 2011)**

When Kendall woke up, he felt the unfamiliar sensation of an arm around him. Something was stroking his hair, and his chest was rising and falling against another. He opened his eyes to find Logan's staring back at him.

"You're awake." Logan said with a smile.

"Did you stay here the whole time?"

"Of course I did."

"Why?" Kendall wrinkled his eyebrows.

"You... you asked me to..." Logan said, confused.

"I did?"

"Yes. You don't remember?"

"No. The last thing I remember is telling you I didn't want to go to sleep." Kendall said. He didn't know why Logan was holding him so tenderly, but he wasn't about to tell him to stop.

"Oh. So... you don't remember... um..."

"What? Did I do something...?"

"Well... you..." Logan was stuck. He was so happy when Kendall finally kissed him. And now he didn't even remember doing it. What should he say? Should he tell him? He didn't want to lie. But what if he didn't really want to kiss him? "You told me you don't like to be alone, so I agreed to stay with you. And then..." Logan smiled at the memory, "you told me about hearing my voice for the first time. And you told me you were afraid that this was all a dream or that I would get sick of you one day, but promised this was real and that I would never get tired of having you around."

"I said all of that?" Kendall had no clue.

"Yeah. It must have been the drugs making you less afraid to talk about it. That's probably why you can't remember, too. So... was it true?"

Kendall looked conflicted. "Yeah, all of that is true. I just didn't plan on telling you any of it."

"Why not? I liked hearing it. It made me feel good."

"It did?"

"Absolutely. And... I said some things too."

"Like what?"

"I um... I told you I like you."

"You like me?"

"Yeah. I like you a lot, Kendall." Logan continued to stroke Kendall's hair as he moved his other hand up to brush a finger over his lips.

"Oh. _Oh_. You mean..."

"You shook up my world, Kendall. I went into that kitchen thinking it would be boring and that it would be the longest month of my life. But then you came in and... the month just flew by. I know we haven't known each other long but I can't imagine my life without you."

"You know I... I feel the same..."

"I do know. You kissed me."

"I what?" Kendall was shocked.

"You kissed me. It was so perfect... I just wish you could remember it..."

"Maybe... you should remind me?" Kendall said hopefully.

"I can definitely do that." Logan moved forward to press his lips forcefully over Kendall's. "Did that jog your memory?"

"A little. I kind of remember saying I love your voice..."

"What's so special about my voice anyway?"

"It just... it spoke to me, you know? I heard you and James singing, and don't get me wrong, he can really sing too, but you... there was just this... like magical quality to your voice. Like you were talking to me, almost..."

"Who knows, maybe I _was_ talking to you. All that time... those lyrics... they were all about finding someone..."

"You think this was meant to happen?" Kendall asked, disbelieving. "Like... fate... or something?"

"Why not? You know... bringing you in here was one of the best things I've ever done. Sometimes I think about it and wonder why I did it. I didn't even know you. But something was telling me that... that I needed to have you in my life..."

"I know what you mean. That's how it felt for me too. I knew... I knew I was just a regular person and you're a huge star but I always hoped one day I'd meet you. I just couldn't let that wish go."

"And now here we are."

"And... where exactly are we?" Kendall needed some clarification.

"Hmm. Well, it looks like we've gone past friendship..."

"How far past?" Kendall finally felt confident enough to reach out and touch Logan. He began to rub his side as he stared into his eyes.

"Pretty far. And we've been picking up speed."

"You really don't mind that I was homeless? Logan... I'm not just low-class. I have _nothing_ to offer you... Why would you even want me?"

"Nothing to offer? Kendall, don't ever say that. Do I seem like the kind of person who would care about your money or lack thereof?"

"No..."

Logan touched his forehead to Kendall's. "And you can give me more then the richest man in the world. You're smart and creative and you're such a strong person. All this time... I didn't know what I was looking for until I found it... in you. Kendall... it might seem like I'm moving kind of fast but I _know_ I never want to lose you."

"I don't want you to lose me either." Kendall admitted quietly.

"Good. So... you... you'd be alright moving into my room, then?"

"Your... your room?"

"Yeah. I'm not... I'm not being forward or anything but... it would be silly for you to sleep alone now that we're together."

"We're together?" Kendall asked with a playful smirk.

Logan blushed. "Well... I just assumed... but if you don't want..."

"Logan, I'm kidding." Kendall grabbed Logan's hand and shyly kissed his cheek. "You need to learn to relax. Of course I want us to be together."

Logan chuckled. "I'm so glad..."

"But you said your room was off limits..."

"That's just because I'm a little... shy... about letting people into my room. You see... uhm... before this I was... not really looking for any kind of relationship. I just wanted to focus on my career and med school and everything... I wanted to wait until things settled down. But I don't want to wait anymore. I really think we have something, Kendall. I'm not going to let it slip away."

"I'm that important to you?"

"Of course. I wasn't kidding when I said you were one of the most important people in my life." Logan said happily.

"So... does this mean we can go out?"

Logan thought for a second. "Absolutely. You know James invited us to double with him tomorrow night. I wasn't sure how to ask you but... would you like to go?"

"Sure. I like James."

"I'm so glad you two are becoming friends. Plus I can finally meet his new boyfriend properly."

"Tonight is your last night at the kitchen, right?" Kendall asked suddenly.

"Yes. Why?"

"Well... you start litter control tomorrow morning..."

"Yes..." Logan wasn't sure where Kendall was going with that.

"How early will you be leaving?"

"Oh. Pretty early. We start just before the sun rises so it isn't too hot while we're working."

"So you'll be gone every morning then?"

"I'm sorry..." Logan hadn't thought of that. He didn't want to leave Kendall alone every single morning

"Don't worry about it..." Kendall sighed sadly.

"No, Kendall... I don't want to be the guy that leaves his boyfriend to wake up by himself..."

"It's really not a big deal. Waking up alone isn't as bad as falling asleep alone..."

"You know if there was anything I could do, I'd never leave you alone again..."

"I know."

"What if... what if we get up early and have breakfast together before I leave? We'd have to wake up super early, but you wouldn't have to wake up alone..."

"I'd like that."

**A/N: I'm not very pleased with how this chapter came out, but the next one is coming along pretty well (I think, anyway) so you have that to look forward to :)**


	13. Foreplay

**Chapter 13 - Foreplay (Posted 30 March 2011)**

**A/N: Ahhh! I'm so sorry it's taken me sooooo long to post this! I'm not sure if this was worth the wait :/ But I promise the next chapter will be up sooner :)**

Logan spent the rest of the afternoon helping Kendall move his things into the bedroom that they would now share.

"It's funny," Kendall said as they hung his clothes in the giant closet, "when you said your room was off limits, I thought maybe you were hiding like a mad scientist lab in here or something that you couldn't let anyone see. It's kind of a let down to see it's just a regular bedroom."

"Ah, but that's where you're wrong." Logan corrected with a smirk. "This is not just a regular bedroom."

"So you _are_ a mad scientist!" Kendall fake-gasped.

"No, but the lights have a dimmer switch, the fireplace is real, and the stereo speakers are built into the ceiling for maximum enjoyment." Logan purred, wrapping his arms around Kendall's neck.

"I see." Kendall said, getting the hint. "What about the bed? Anything special about that?"

"Hmm... why don't we find out?"

Kendall playfully tugged Logan over to the large bed and fell back, bringing him along. He didn't hide the fact that he was turned on. For a moment he thought maybe this was too big a step, but that thought dissolved as Logan began kissing his neck and rubbing between his thighs.

X

It was just before Logan had to run off to his last night at the kitchen when James called. Kendall was asleep, (Logan had worn him out completely!) so he raced to the phone in order to pick it up before it woke Kendall.

"Hello?" Logan whispered.

"Dude, are you being robbed or something?" James said quietly. "Why are you whispering."

"Oh... um... Kendall is asleep, and I don't want to wake him up..."

"He's still asleep?" James asked because he knew about the doctor coming to check him out. "Man, I know those shots mess you up but I didn't think they'd knock him out."

"Well," Logan laughed awkwardly, "it wasn't exactly the medicine..."

"Oh dude. You didn't..."

"We did."

"You freaky little munchkin."

"Munchkin?"

"Gustavo talked to me trying not to use foul language. Apparently it upsets people." James said surprisedly.

"Good luck with that." Logan rolled his eyes. "Anyway, why is it freaky? I'm sure you've had sex with Carlos."

"That's different."

"Why? Because Kendall was homeless? It's not like he was a gutter bum or a prostitute or anything."

"That's not why, Logan. I couldn't care less if he was homeless or not. But you barely know him!"

"He's been living with me for almost two weeks!" Logan argued.

"Yeah, it hasn't even _been_ two weeks since he moved in with you! I've been pursuing Carlos for over a month, and..."

"How is a month better than two weeks?"

"What?"

"I'm asking how a month is better than two weeks. Your relationship with Carlos is different than my relationship with Kendall. They're different people. And you and I are different, so of course the amount of time we need would be different."

"But... two weeks? Isn't that a little soon?"

"Would you have waited longer than that if Carlos had been ready?"

"Well... no..."

"See? James, you're a great friend and I know you're just looking out for me and I appreciate that. But... I just _know_ that I'm not making a mistake. Kendall is..."

"Perfect? Beautiful? Exactly what you've been looking for? Don't worry, man. I get it. I had that same feeling when I promised Carlos I'd wait for him. I took a chance on this person who everyone only saw as a broken soul and I did my best to make him happy. And I don't regret it for a second, it was the best decision I've ever made. So if this guy gives you that feeling in your gut that... that compels you to do everything in your power to put a smile on his face... then I'm not going to tell you how to make your decisions."

"You're being inspirational again, it's surprising." Logan teased.

"Ha ha. But I'm serious. If you've got a good feeling about him then I'm not going to stop you. But be careful man. You never know what people are going to say or..."

"We're famous, James, I got over caring about what people say a long time ago."

"Ok, then."

"So... why exactly did you call?"

"To see if you'd asked Kendall about that double date I invited you guys on."

"I did, he said he'd like to go."

"I see. And was this before or after you drained him of all his energy?"

"Oh, fudge off."

"Fudge?"

"Gustavo talked to me too."

X

After hanging up, Logan went back to his bedroom to see if Kendall was awake. He crept into the room and felt himself blush as he saw him laying naked on his side. It appeared that he'd tried to cover himself with the sheet, but it only came halfway up his legs.

_Why am I blushing?_ he thought as he gazed down at his new lover. _Should I wake him up or let him sleep?_

Deciding he'd rather tell Kendall he was leaving rather than have him find out on his own, he sat down on the side of the bed and began playing with Kendall's hair.

"Kendall?"

"Hmm?" His eyelids fluttered open and he stretched before looking up into Logan's eyes.

"I'm leaving. I'll be back in a few hours and then we can have dinner, ok?"

"Ok."

Logan didn't like the slightly sad smile on Kendall's face, so he bent down to kiss it away. "This is the last night I'll have to spend there. After this, we'll be able to spend more time together."

"Except for mornings."

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't be sorry, Logan.' Kendall patted his chest. "You're paying your debt to society, even though it seems like a waste while there are real criminals getting away with worse things... but still, I know you're not doing this because you want to leave me here alone."

"Thanks for understanding... Are you sure you're ok though?"

"I'm fine, Logan." Kendall smiled, honored by Logans worry for him. "You only have two more months of community service, and then you're all _mine_."

"I like that perspective." Logan said. He _really_ liked it. The thought of being able to spend a full 24 hours with Kendall was enough to make his knees weak. Just two months. That's all he needed to live through before he was able to be Kendall's.

X

That night, Logan came home with gourmet takeout. Kendall's appetite was still small after spending so much time on the streets, but it was growing and his body was becoming healthier every day.

When they went to bed, Kendall fell right asleep in the comfort of Logan's arms.

Kendall was happy to wake up at four in the morning to eat breakfast with Logan before he had to go do his community service.

After Logan left, Kendall began to feel a little sad. He was still tired, but he didn't want to go back to sleep.

So he waited for him. He watched some television for a few minutes before he heard the doorbell ring.

_What should I do?_ Kendall knew Logan expected to think of this as his home, and he did, but it was still Logan's house. But Logan wasn't here, so should he answer the door? Whoever it was was probably looking for Logan, so if no one answered that would be fine, right? But what if Logan was expecting someone? Wouldn't he have mentioned that?

He snuck up to the door and looked out the peep hole to see if it was a delivery or something. It was James.

Kendall gave a sigh of relief and opened the door. "Hey, James. What's up?"

"Not much. I was just stopping by to see if you wanted any company while Logan is out."

"Did he put you up to this? I told him I don't need a babysitter..."

"No, he just wanted me to check up on you. He's just worried about you, you know? And he's my friend, and _you're_ my friend now too, so I'm just trying to look out for both of you. He just doesn't want to come home and find you gone."

"Gone?" Kendall asked, shocked. He knew Logan worried about him having a mental breakdown from all the stress of being homeless and then suddenly living with a celebrity. And he knew he worried about him getting hurt angry or upset at Logan's frequent absence.

"Yeah. Look..." James bit his lip. "I'm not supposed to tell you this, so if he asks, you figured this out on your own. But he's crazy about you. And he's afraid that one day he's going to come back and you'll be gone. He's scared you're going to just decide to leave. That's why he has me call you or visit you while he's out. He doesn't want you to want to leave."

"Wait... _he's_ afraid that _I'm_ going to leave?"

"Yes."

"Why in the world would he be afraid of a stupid thing like that? Why would I leave?"

"That's what I said. I told him you wouldn't. But he wouldn't listen, he's really worked up over having to leave you all the time. So, to calm him down I promised him I'd come make sure you're still here."

"I don't know what to say..."

"Just promise me that when he comes home this afternoon you'll kiss the hell out of him, ok?"

Kendall blushed. "Ok..."

"But don't use up too much energy," James reminded him, "you two are going out with me and Carlos tonight."

"Oh, that's right! I guess I'll see you then?"

"Yep." James winked.

X

Kendall kept his promise to James. When Logan came home, Kendall was waiting right on the other side of the door. He pounced as soon as Logan walked in and started kissing him fiercely.

"Welcome home." Kendall said deeply.

"Indeed."

"How many times..." Kendall whispered with a small kiss on the throat, "must I tell you..." he gave him another kiss, "that I don't need a babysitter?"

"I'm sorry." Logan said, but his voice broke as he felt a hand slide into the back of his pants. "I just..."

"I'm not leaving, Logan."

"What?"

"I said I'm not leaving. I'll be here every day when you get home."

"Ah! James promised not to tell you...!"

"Don't be mad at him." Kendall urged by rubbing Logan's chest. "He was just trying to help."

"I know... but I don't want you to feel like I'm trapping you here..."

"You're not. I'm here because I want to be here. With you. Alright?"

"Alright."

X

Later that evening, Logan and Kendall were trying to coordinate their outfits for their date.

"Won't it look weird if we match?" Kendall asked.

"Won't it look weird if we clash?" Logan rebutted.

"Why do I have to wear a suit anyway?"

"Because the restaurant has a dress code."

"That's dumb... but you look amazing in a suit..."

"You would too if you just put it on."

"It's too tight." Kendall pouted.

"It's _snug_ because it's fitted. It flatters you."

"But it's uncomfortable."

"You can change back into jeans and a t-shirt once we get home. Hell, you can run around the house in nothing but a paper sack for all I care, just please put the suit on."

"Hmm..." Kendall scowled cutely as he grabbed the pants for his suit. "Will I always have to wear a suit when we go out?"

"No, of course not. In fact, next time we'll go somewhere more casual, I promise, but please get dressed. We're going to be late."

"Ok, fine, but only because you look so damn fine in that suit..."

Logan rolled his eyes and helped Kendall get dressed. Then he pulled him out of the house and into the car. He drove speedily to the restaurant and they got there just in time to see James and Carlos get seated.

The waitress led Logan and Kendall to the table and took their drink orders a while.

The initial silence was somewhat awkward.

James was the first to speak. He reintroduced Carlos and Logan and introduced Carlos to Kendall for the first time.

Everyone got along great. Kendall felt a little out of place in the beginning, but nobody did anything to make him feel unwelcome, so by the middle of the date he was somewhat loosened up.

Unfortunately, they had to leave after the paparazzi showed up and started snapping pictures and inquiring about the strange boy Logan was with.

"Kendall, I don't want you to worry about it." Logan said once they were safely inside the house. "If I thought there was anything wrong with being with you, I wouldn't be with you. I don't care what the tabloids say. You're way more important that that."

"But what if they find out I'm homeless! What if they think you're a freak for just inviting some dirty hobo into your million-dollar mansion? People are going to have a fit!"

"I don't care. Kendall, I want _you_. If my fans begin to hate me because I brought someone I have feelings for off the streets and gave him a home, then I don't want their support. I didn't do anything wrong, and _you_ didn't do anything wrong so stop worrying about it. Everything is going to be fine, I swear. If I cared about shallow things like that... I never would have talked to you in the first place."

"I knew there was something different about you." Kendall said, signaling the end of the argument.

Logan smiled happily. His life felt like it was more of a fairy tale than actuality at the moment. Kendall was the greatest thing that ever happened to him. So now he just had to fight through these next two months, and his reward would be a happy life with Kendall.


	14. The News Is Out

**Chapter 14 - The News Is Out (Posted 12 April 2011)**

**A/N: Wow, I am so so so sorry it's taking me so long to update lately. I've been focusing on my other stories that I've been neglecting because of this one. And I've been working on an anniversary fic, but it's not working out very well. But I'm trying to balance them all out. So here is the next chapter of "No Alternative"!**

The next morning, Kendall woke up alone. He and Logan had worn each other out again, so Logan probably hadn't wanted to disturb him when he left to do his community service. Kendall was proud of Logan for doing his best to balance everything out, and he didn't blame Logan for having to leave all the time, but he couldn't help feeling a little bummed.

He sat up when he heard the doorbell ring. He padded into the hallway and down the steps to sneak a peek at who it was. It was a flower delivery man. _Who would be sending Logan flowers?_ Kendall thought.

Sighing tiredly, he opened the door.

"Good morning." the man said. "Got some flowers for ya. Ya just gotta sign this here paper."

Kendall took the clipboard and signed Logan's name. "Thanks." He carried the basket to the kitchen table and stared at them. It was a large arrangements of roses and tulips and daisies. He thought they were beautiful and wondered who they were from.

Figuring it couldn't hurt to read the card, he reached forward and plucked it from the plastic fork in the middle of the flowers.

_Kendall,_

_I just wanted you to know that_

_I'm thinking about you and I_

_can't wait to come home to you._

_-Logan_

Kendall was floored. _Logan sent me flowers?_ He didn't know what to think. He'd gotten a little jealous thinking about Logan getting flowers from someone else. But he never even considered they were for him. He smiled and stared between the card and the flowers. Logan had promised not to send James over anymore, but that wasn't going to stop him from reminding Kendall about how he felt.

He shook his head and smiled as he read the card over and over again. It was just a simple greeting but it meant more to him than anything else Logan had ever given him. This was a symbol. Of what, he wasn't quite sure, but he knew this was the first step in a new direction for their relationship.

When Logan came home, Kendall was asleep on the sofa. He smiled fondly and went to sit next to him. He kissed him awake.

Kendall sighed sleepily into the kiss. "You're home."

"I am. And I'm all yours for the rest of the day."

"Thank you for the flowers."

"You're welcome. I just... you know... I wanted to do something to show you how I feel and..."

"They're beautiful. Just like you."

Logan blushed as Kendall sat up to kiss him again. "Should I make us some lunch?"

"Sure."

"What would you like?"

"Anything is fine. You know I'm not picky."

Logan laughed. "And I keep telling you that I will make you anything you want. I can afford it."

"Logan, anything you make is better than the most expensive food in the world. As long as I'm eating it with you, I'm the happiest person alive."

Logan's smile turned serious. "Really?"

"Really. I'm not just saying that. Logan... can I tell you something?"

"Yeah. Anything."

"You make me really happy."

Logan ran a hand through Kendall's messy hair. "You make me really happy too. I can't imagine my life without you."

"Me either."

"So... do you want to go out for lunch instead?"

"Out?"

"Yes, as in outside this house. You know, there's grass and trees and..."

"Ha, you're such a jokester. Seriously, though, I've only been out a few times since I came here."

"I know. And I feel bad about that. I want to show you off."

Kendall laughed. "I think it would be the other way around."

"Not to me. I'm proud to call you my own, and I want everyone to know the man who's stolen my heart."

"Stolen?" Kendall said teasingly. "If I remember correctly, you were quite willing when you gave it to me."

Logan rolled his eyes. "Either way, I think it's time my fans see us together, don't you?"

"Whatever you want to do."

"Go get ready. I'll start the car awhile."

"I don't have to wear a suit do I?" Kendall pleaded.

"No. I promised, remember?"

"I remember. Besides, I look better in jeans."

"You look amazing in everything."

Kendall blushed before going up to their bedroom to change out of his pajamas. Then he hurried out of the house and got into Logan's car. Logan started driving.

"Where would you like to go?"

"I have no idea." Kendall said. He didn't know any of the restaurants since he'd gotten most of his meals from soup kitchens and garbage cans.

"Well, what kind of food are you hungry for."

"Hot." Kendall said sarcastically.

"Ok, that's not very specific." Logan chuckled.

"Hmm... how about a half-inch thick ham steak cooked to exactly 356 degrees with two tablespoons of Heinz dijon mustard on the side? Is that specific enough?"

"Come on, I'm being serious." Logan said with a smile. "It's all about you. I'll take you anywhere."

"New York City?"

"I can have a bus ready by tomorrow."

"Romania?"

"I'll call my travel agent."

"The moon?"

"I've got contacts at NASA." Logan looked sideways at Kendall.

Kendall just sighed contently. "I could go for Chinese."

Logan nodded. "Chinese it is then." He drove around for a while yet before pulling into a smallish Chinese restaurant in a strip mall.

"People are going to recognize you."

"I know. They might even recognize you, the paparazzi did manage to get some snapshots of you the last time we went out."

"Yeah, as if anyone would take a second look at me."

"Hey," Logan said sadly, "what's this all of a sudden? We talked about this. I thought you were over these insecurities..."

"I am. Sorry. Momentary lapse." Kendall said happily.

"Ok, if you're sure..."

"I'm totally sure."

Logan leaned across and kissed his cheek before getting out of the car. Kendall followed him as they walked into the restaurant.

It was a buffet and Logan ate _a lot_ but Kendall just had one plateful. Logan urged him to get more but he just wasn't that hungry. He apologized for making Logan spend the money for a whole buffet and hardly eating anything, but Logan insisted that it was fine.

The restaurant wasn't that busy so other than a few hushed murmurs, no one really paid any attention to the couple.

They went home and engaged in some well-overdue snuggling.

When the doorbell rang, Logan whined. "Aw man. Who could that possibly be?"

"You should answer it. It might be important." Kendall said, even though he didn't want to lose any time with Logan.

"Nah. Whoever it is can wait."

Kendall playfully pushed Logan off of him. "Get the door, Logan. I'll be here when you get back."

"Huhhhh." Logan sighed dramatically. "Fine. I just hope they don't wanna come in." He walked slowly to the door and peeked out to see who it was. "This can't be happening." he pouted. "The day I promise to spend with you, my producer shows up."

"Producer?" Kendall sat up.

"Yeah, Gustavo. And it must be important because he brought his assistant, Kelly."

"I thought you said she always follows him everywhere."

"She does, but she has her angry face on." Logan said darkly. "And her face is naturally angry, so her angry face is pretty scary."

"What do you think they want?"

"I don't know. They probably just want to yell at me again for getting into this whole community service mess. And you know, that makes me pretty mad because I kind of like doing it. I wish I didn't have such am unforgiving schedule, but hey, you win some you lose some."

"Well, are you going to let them in?"

"I guess I have to. My car is parked out there and the garage door is open so they can see the limo. If they know I'm here but not answering I could get in trouble."

"Then what are you waiting for? Answer it! I'll wait in the kitchen."

Logan looked over at him. "Why would you do that?"

"They might not want me here if it's really important..."

"Why not?"

"Because they're here to talk to you, not some guy who..."

"Kendall, stop it. You're not just some guy. You're my boyfriend and maybe it's time that they meet you."

"I don't know if that's a good idea." Kendall know he was important to Logan, but he was paranoid about meeting his producer. He wanted to be a big part of Logan's life, but he was pretty sure this part was off limits. He was afraid that if people found out who he really was, it could ruin his career.

"If you really don't want to, I'm not going to force you. But I'd like you to meet them."

"Well... alright. It can't be too bad, right?"

Logan pursed his lips. "It won't be bad at all, you'll see. Just fix your hair and sit up straight, they'll love you."

Kendall just nodded and combed his hair with his fingers. He sat with the best posture he could manage and watched nervously as Logan opened the door and led Gustavo and Kelly into the living room.

"Hey, guys," Logan said as he went to sit next to Kendall, "this is my boyfriend, Kendall. Kendall, this is Gustavo, my producer, and his assistant, Kelly."

Kelly smiled and shook Kendall's hand. "Nice to meet you."

"And you." Kendall smiled cautiously.

"Gustavo, say hi." Kelly hit him.

"Hi." Gustavo grunted.

Kendall glanced awkwardly at Logan, hoping he would jump in soon.

"So," Logan said, catching sight of Kendall's uneasiness, "what brings you guys all the way to my mansion?"

"We have to talk to you about..." Gustavo started, but paused and looked at Kendall. "Well, it's something we'd like to discuss in private, actually."

"Yeah." Kelly confirmed. "I'm sorry, but it's for Logan's ears only."

"Now wait a minute," Logan butted in, "anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of Kendall. He's..."

"Uh, Logan..." Kendall interrupted him by holding a hand up. "I don't want to get in the middle of things, so why don't I just go use the bathroom or something." He stood up and began walking away.

"No, Kendall, you don't have to leave." Logan called after him.

"It's ok, I'll just be a few minutes." Kendall's voice grew more distant.

Logan sighed angrily. "What was that about? What could be so important that you can't even talk about it in front of Kendall?"

"This." Gustavo hissed as Kelly pulled a magazine out of her clipboard. She handed it to him and he held it up before handing it over to Logan.

Logan smiled passively at the picture on the cover. It was of him and Kendall when they were on their double date with James and Carlos. "He looks good in a suit, doesn't he? Maybe I should show this to him to prove it..."

"This isn't about the suit." Kelly said gently.

"Right." Logan shook his head to stop his thoughts from heading in the wrong direction. "So, what is it about?"

"Did you read the article that goes along with that cover photo?" Kelly asked.

"Uh, no, I don't really read magazines." Logan said, flipping through it.

"Apparently, that photo was taken by an investigative journalist." Gustavo barked.

"And... that's bad?" Logan asked, still not getting it.

"You let a homeless man into your house!" Gustavo roared. "Do you know what people are saying?"

"No..." Logan said, appalled. "But I don't care. I like Kendall. He's really great and nothing anybody says can change my mind because I..."

"You can't date a homeless man, Logan." Kelly said apologetically.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Logan was becoming more disgusted by the second.

"You have to break up with him," Gustavo said in a low, commanding voice, "or we drop you from the label."


	15. Bad Publicity

**Chapter 15 - Bad Publicity (Posted 14 April 2011)**

Logan stared, horrified, at Gustavo. "Break up with him?"

"Is everyone deaf lately?" Gustavo asked loudly.

"I am _not_ breaking up with him." Logan stood and crossed his arms.

"This is really bad publicity, Logan, this piece has only been out for a couple days." Kelly tried to reason with him. "And already your reputation is turning sour."

"How?" Logan highly doubted he could be hated for something like this.

"People don't like the idea that you're shacking up with a man from the streets." Gustavo yelled. "It was bad enough you and James came out of the closet without our permission, and now this? You can't keep doing this!"

"I refuse. I will not break up with him. He's too important to me."

"More important than your musical career?" Kelly asked seriously.

Logan hesitated. He did love his music. It had been the most important thing to him for a long time. "I think so, yeah." he stammered.

"You think or you know?" Kelly looked really concerned.

"I..." Logan wasn't really sure. The obvious answer was yes, Kendall was much more important than his music right now. But was he worth giving it up his whole life? "I know. He's more important to me than anything."

"You're making a big mistake, Logan." Gustavo said with a deep sigh. "What about James?"

"James is my best friend, he'll understand. He'll probably be better off going solo anyway, the only reason I came here with him was so he wouldn't have to get started all alone."

"Wait." Kelly pursed her lips, trying to come up with a solution. "What if... you _pretend_ to break up with him? That way, you can keep dating in secret and no one has to find out that..."

"No way." Logan shook his head. "Not a snowball's chance in Hell. I'm dating Kendall and I'm not going to hide our relationship. If you can't handle that, then I don't want to be on your label."

"You're going to regret those words." Gustavo squinted and pointed at him. "We're going to leave and then a few days later, you're going to regret choosing Kendall over your career and you're going to call us up, begging for us to re-sign you."

"I won't." Logan said proudly.

"We'll see." Gustavo stood and walked out of the house, slamming the door behind him.

Kelly stood too and rolled her eyes at both of them. "We'll give you three days to reconsider. If we don't hear from you, we'll assume you want out and have the paperwork drawn up to expel you from the label."

"I'm not going to change my mind." Logan said to her.

"I'm sorry it has to end like this. You have so much talent." She shook her head as she showed herself out.

Logan quick turned around to grab his phone. He had to call James before Gustavo or Kelly did.

It rang a few times and he was afraid they'd already gotten to him, but he picked up and Logan gave a quick sigh of relief.

"Helllllo?" James's voice floated from the speaker.

"James, you're my friend, right?"

"Um, yes... we've been friends since we were born... why? Are you in trouble?"

"Kind of..." Logan said quietly.

"Alright where are you and what do you need?"

"Actually... I'm at home... and I need to apologize to you."

"Apologize? To me? For what?" James sounded like he thought Logan was just joking around.

"For quitting Big Time Rush."

"You _what_? Dude!"

"Hold on!" Logan pleaded. "Before you tell me you hate me, please let me explain."

"I'm listening..."

"Do you remember when you, Carlos, Kendall, and I all went out together?"

"Yeah..."

"Well, apparently someone printed a nasty article about my relationship with Kendall."

James thought for a second before speaking. "Ok, so... how does that translate into quitting BTR?"

"Gustavo saw it and didn't like it. He was just at my house and told me that I had to either break up with him or quit the band. I'm really sorry about this but..."

"Wait, slow down, man." James said calmly. "Gustavo actually said that?"

"Yes. And Kelly agreed with him."

"Wow..."

"I know! And it all just happened so fast... I mean, James, you know I love our music and you're my best friend in the world but..."

"Hey, look. I have to admit I'm bummed about this. I can't imagine a better job than goofing around with my bud all day, and I'd rather not give that up. But I would've slapped you silly if I found out you broke up with him over this. You did the right thing."

"I know I did. Kendall is just... a part of my life now."

"A permanent part?"

Logan pondered that. Permanent? "I don't know. Maybe."

"Maybe?"

"We haven't been together that long... things are kind of still up in the air."

"I see. Well, for what it's worth, I'm proud of you. And I wish you good luck."

"Um, thanks." Logan said cautiously. "I'm glad you're taking this so well."

"Why wouldn't I? I would have done the same thing in your situation. And would you be upset with me?"

"Of course not..."

"Exactly. I know what it's like to have someone like this just drop into your life and rearrange everything."

"I suppose you do. How are things with Carlos?"

"Wonderful..." James said, but his voice sounded kind of off.

"You say it like it's a bad thing..."

"Oh, it's not. It's just... we had a teeny tiny little fight this morning..."

"Oh no! What happened?"

"I'll tell you about it later." James promised. "Right now, I think you need to go talk to Kendall."

X

After his phone call with James, Logan ran up the steps and into his bedroom. Kendall was sprawled out on his back in the middle of their bed. He looked over at Logan when he heard the door open.

Logan went and laid next to him. "Why didn't you come back down?" He was glad he wasn't there to hear all that, but he didn't want him to feel like he wasn't welcome there when he had guests.

"I didn't know when you would be finished." Kendall said easily.

"You didn't have to leave. I wanted you to stay." _Maybe then they wouldn't have said what they did._ But the more Logan thought about it, the happier he was about himself. He wasn't even that upset about losing his job. If they didn't want Kendall in the picture, he didn't want to be a part of it.

"But they didn't want me there."

"I don't care about anything they say. I only care about you." Logan said this a little more fiercely than he'd intended, but Kendall didn't seem to notice.

"Thanks." Kendall smiled up at him.

"You're welcome. Now... where were we before we were so rudely interrupted?"

Kendall lifted his head and kissed Logan slowly. When Logan started to pull away, Kendall put his hands on the sides of Logan's face and pulled him down and continued to kiss him.

"Woah." Logan said, as he'd been deprived of oxygen. "You've never kissed me like that before..."

"I couldn't help myself." Kendall replied with a smirk.

"Feel free to do that again any time you want." Logan said before unbuttoning his shirt.

X

"Logan?"

"Yeah?" Logan was half asleep, and Kendall was next to him playing with his hair.

"How can this... not... gross you out?"

Logan's eyes snapped open and he looked at Kendall. "How can what not gross me out?"

"Sex... with me."

"Why would..."

"Because." Kendall said meekly. "I was just... a dirty guy living on the streets. How can that not make you..."

"Kendall, please stop doing this." Logan felt himself start to cry. Why was Kendall always putting himself down lately?

"I'm sorry... I just don't..."

"I don't wanna hear it, Kendall." Logan sweetly reached over and rubbed Kendall's chest. "Nothing about you grosses me out. I don't care if you were homeless, you should know this by now. All I care about is being with you. You've got to stop beating yourself up over this."

"Why are you crying?"

"Because you just keep assuming that you're not living up to my standards or something. And it hurts me to see how much you dislike yourself. And it's kind of sad that you think I would dislike you because of something so petty. You're the greatest person I know and I wouldn't trade you for anything. Please, I just don't want you to feel inadequate or gross or ugly or anything like that. You need to understand that this is about more than just kissing or having sex. Unless that's all it is to you..."

"No! I swear that's not all I care about, you know that..."

"Exactly, so why are you acting as if I'm so insensitive...?"

"I'm sorry, Logan. I really didn't mean it like that. It's just so hard for me to believe that anyone could care about me this much."

"I thought we already had this discussion."

"We did. I'm just being paranoid. I'll stop now." Kendall felt bad. He was thinking all of this, but the only reason he was saying it was so Logan wouldn't notice that there was something else on his mind.

"I didn't mean that you should stop talking about it. If you really feel this way..."

"Logan." Kendall stopped him with a kiss. "I'll try not to let it bother me, I promise."

"Are you sure? Because I'll do anything to make you see just how much you mean to me."

"I'm sure. Thank you, Logan. You're the best boyfriend I could've asked for." Kendall hugged Logan close, and Logan snuggled into his warmth. They were tired; Logan from dealing with the emotional strain from earlier and Kendall from going out for the first time in forever. So they fell asleep. And even though he slept rather easily, Logan couldn't help but feel a little uneasy about Kendall's low self-esteem.

**A/N: More drama to come later! But the next chapter will be Jarlos I think cuz it'll be a better lead-in for what I have planned for Kogan mwa ha ha!**


	16. Don't Let it Get to You

**Chapter 16 - Don't Let It Get To You (Posted 25 April 2011)**

**A/N: Probably the last Jarlos chapter. The story is nearing the end now. But I hope you stick around to see what happens :D**

It was pretty early in the morning. Carlos had spent the night at James's house, but still needed to go to work. Carlos was just putting his jacket on when his wallet fell out. "Crap."

"Oh, I'll get it." James started to bend down but Carlos frantically reached out to stop him.

"No! I can get it!"

But James was already picking it up, and looking at what was displayed on the inside.

"There's a picture of me in there." James giggled.

"Yeah..." Carlos laughed awkwardly. "It's the one you gave me... I keep it in there to cheer me up when I can't just come over and see you."

"Aaw, Carlos, that's too cute."

"Ok, you can give me my wallet back now." Carlos held out his hand.

"Can I see what other pictures you have in here?"

"Um..." Carlos gulped.

"Is there something in here you don't want me to see?" James asked jokingly. He started backing away from Carlos and flipping through the pictures he had in there. Most of them he'd seen before, they were of his family. Carlos started chasing him and begging for his wallet back. "Dude, seriously, if you're hiding like a picture of Brad Pitt in here, I'm not going to get jealous... I have one of... Johnny... Depp..." James slowed as he got to the last picture. He didn't recognize this person. He was handsome, but he was very young. And the picture looked old, like Carlos had had it for a long time. "Who is this?" James turned it to show it to Carlos.

Carlos cringed. "Um... it's... no one..."

"Come on," James said, getting worried, "you can tell me who it is."

"Just give it back." Carlos swiped it from James's hand, along with the wallet, and stuffed it back inside. Then he put the wallet back in his pocket and walked toward the front door.

"Wait." James ran ahead of him and blocked the door, preventing him from leaving. "Why won't you tell me who it is?"

"I can't. It's none of your business."

"Yes it is. I thought we were at that point, Carlos, where we could tell each other anything."

"We are... but..."

"Oh my God." James whispered. "It's him isn't it?"

"James, it isn't what you think..."

"It's not? Then what is it, Carlos? Why do you carry a picture of Xavier in your wallet?"

"I couldn't..."

"So I'm right. It is Xavier."

"Yes, it is, but it's not because..."

"I thought you were over him."

"I am..."

"No, you're obviously not. You carry his _picture_ everywhere you go!"

"I carry yours too! In the very front!" Carlos yelled.

"Yeah, so you can hide your dead, abusive, ex-boyfriend's photo behind it."

"You know that's not true..."

"Do I?"

"Yes! I carry your picture because seeing your face makes everything better for me."

"So why do you carry his? To remind you of all the pain you went through with him? I worked hard to take that pain away and then I find out you're keeping a picture of the cause of all that pain?"

"No..."

"Face it, Carlos, you've been lying to yourself this whole time." James stepped away from the door, backing slightly away from Carlos. "You say you didn't love him, but you did. And you still do. And you can't be with me while you're still in love with someone else."

"James, I don't love Xavier, I swear."

"Carlos, you're a really great guy and I thought... I thought you were perfect for me. But now this..."

"Oh, please... please don't be saying what I think you're saying..."

"What would you like me to say?" James said, softening his voice.

"That I'm an idiot but you'll give me another chance because... because..."

"Because?"

"Well... I can't really think of a reason."

"What's that supposed to mean?" James asked as Carlos opened the door.

"That I blew it. Again." Carlos walked out the door, leaving James feeling guiltier than ever.

X

James didn't know what do do. He just wanted to rewind the whole morning and stop himself from picking up that wallet.

But why would Carlos keep Xavier's picture with him if he didn't still have feelings for him? He knew from the time Carlos told him the story that there was a chance Carlos still had some feelings he needed to deal with. And he was prepared for that. But he wasn't prepared to find that photo.

He was feeling so conflicted. He was even feeling jealous, though he wouldn't admit it even to himself. Carlos was supposed to be his, but Xavier still had a hold on him.

His goal throughout this whole relationship was to make Carlos's pain go away. And finding out that he was being thwarted by a photograph was maddening.

The phone rang and even though he was in no mood to talk to anyone, he answered it in case it was an emergency. It was Logan, giving him even worse news. He was quitting the band. So now he was doubly alone.

But he couldn't blame Logan. He knew what it's like to want to do anything to keep someone by your side. And through that conversation, he realized why he was so upset. And he had to see him. He had to apologize and make things right.

He hopped into his car and realized he was crying as he felt tears drop into his lap. So he sped to Carlos's house with foggy eyes and ran up to his door. He shoved his key in the hole and burst inside, startling Carlos who was standing in the hallway. He had his jacket half way on and his eyes were puffy.

"James... I was just going to come see you." Carlos admitted quietly.

James walked over to him and hugged him close. "I'm sorry I got so upset. I don't care if you have the picture. I don't care why you have it, it's none of my business."

Carlos stepped out of the hug with a tiny smile on his lips. "Actually, James, it is your business."

"No, it's your personal..."

"I don't love Xavier." Carlos locked his eyes on James's. "I don't know if I ever did or not, my memory is so skewed by everything that's happened since then, but I know I don't love him now."

"How do you know?"

"Because I love you. You erased all doubt in my mind because all I think about... is you."

"You love me?" James suddenly felt like they'd switched roles; all of a sudden he was the insecure one and Carlos was the only one who could build him back up.

"I do. I've wanted to tell you for a few days actually but I didn't know how and, well, now seemed like the perfect opportunity."

"I love you too."

"I was hoping you'd say that." Carlos's eyes twinkled and he moved in for a big kiss. "Here," he pulled out his wallet and took Xavier's picture out, handing it to James, "take it."

"What do you want me to do with it?"

"Whatever you feel is the right thing to do. Come sit down with me, I'll tell you why I have it..."

"You don't have to do that."

"I want to, so much that it feels like I have to, so come on." Carlos grabbed James's hand and took him over to the sofa. "His parents gave that picture to me after he died."

"Why?"

"They told me that they were so sorry about what he did to me. He was wrong to treat me that way and he was an idiot to drive me away."

"He certainly was." James agreed.

"They gave the picture in hopes that someday, despite his... evilness, I could learn to forgive him. But if there's one thing I learned after going from one abusive relationship to the next and then finally meeting the most fantastic person in the whole world... it's that I can never forgive him. I don't know what kind of person that makes me, and I don't care because he hurt me all the time and he knew he was doing it and just didn't want to stop. I can't forgive that. But, thanks to you, I am able to move on from it. So I don't want the picture anymore. I want you to take it and get rid of it."

"Why me?"

"Isn't it obvious? Because I love you. You made me strong again but I'm all in your hands, James. You have the power to make or break me, so only natural that you would take the one thing that's been weighing me down for so many years."

James held up the small picture and looked at it. The boy in the picture didn't look evil the first time he saw it. But now that he knew who it was, he saw the invisible horns he wore. So he did the only thing he could think of. He ripped the picture into many tiny pieces and stood up.

"Where are you going?" Carlos asked, following him.

"Kitchen." James walked to the sink and let the pieces of Xavier's picture fall into the drain. He flipped a switch, making the garbage disposal groan as it came to life, forever deleting Xavier from Carlos's and James's lives.


	17. Missing

**Chapter 17 - Missing (Posted 1 June 2011)**

Logan woke up alone. There was no sense of alarm, as he'd woken up without Kendall on many occasions. He was usually in the bathroom or getting a drink.

He walked over to the bathroom and peeked inside, but it was dark. That meant Kendall was downstairs. So Logan did his business before sleepily trudging down the steps. He wandered into the kitchen, but the lights were off in there as well.

"Kendall?" Logan called out.

There was no reply.

"Kendall, are you hiding somewhere? If you're planning on jumping out and scaring me, it's not going to work."

Still nothing.

"Ok," Logan said worriedly, "this isn't funny. Kendall?" He turned the lights on and looked around, but Kendall wasn't there. He shouted at the top of his lungs, "Kendall you come here right now, please, you're worrying me!"

Then the doorbell rang.

"Great. Who the hell is that at this hour?" Logan ran to the door and peeped out. He rolled his eyes and opened the door. "James, is something wrong?"

"No!" James said gleefully as he just waltzed right into Logan's house. "Everything is perfect!"

"Things worked out with Carlos, then, I assume?" Logan asked absently as he continued to look over his shoulder for any sign of Kendall.

"Yes! We made up and... he told me he loves me."

Logan wasn't really paying attention. "That's nice."

"Logan," James put his hands on his friend's shoulders and steadied him, "did you hear me? Carlos said he loves me. And I said it back."

Logan's eyes widened along with his smile. "Oh my gosh, James! That's wonderful!"

"Isn't it?"

"I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks. So, what's up with you? You seem distracted..."

Logan closed his eyes. "Um... I think Kendall went... out for a walk or something because I woke up and he wasn't there."

"Would he do that?" James asked, slightly confused. "Would he just go out like that?"

"No... but there's no other explanation unless he was kidnapped..."

"Have you looked all over the house? Maybe he got lost."

"He's not lost, he's lived here long enough to know his way around."

"Maybe he fainted or something."

"Not helping!"

"Sorry... I'm just saying you should look for him more."

"I didn't look in the basement..."

"Ok," James said calmly, "let's go look down there before you really start freaking out." He directed Logan through the kitchen.

"Wait, what's that?" Logan noticed a blue paper sitting on the table. "I didn't see this the last time I was in here."

James grabbed it and skimmed through it. "Oh no..."

"What? What's 'oh no'?"

James glanced up at Logan's panicked face and began reading him the letter. "Dear Logan, I hope you don't think me a sinner, but I eavesdropped on your conversation with your producer. I couldn't help it, I had to know what was so urgent they made an unannounced house call. I can't tell you how touched I was by your words, but I cannot allow you to give up everything for which you've worked so hard. I can't let you throw it all away for me. I always knew that there would come a time when I would have to leave you, not because I don't care about you, but because my nerves got the best of me. And I finally realized that I was only holding you back, especially if you were ready to quit BTR because of me. You're a beautiful man and whoever you end up with will be the luckiest person on Earth. I know I promised I would never leave you, but I was lying, and for that I am sorry. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to be with you and I'd hoped I could make it forever with you, but deep down I knew it was impossible. I'm sorry for lying and I'm sorry for leaving and I'm sorry I waisted so much of your time. The best thing for you to do is move on. Kendall."

"Ohmygod." Logan fell to his knees.

"Logan?" James looked down at him with concern. "Are you ok?"

"He left me. Kendall left me. I knew it. I knew this was going to happen!" Logan pounded his fists on the floor.

James bent down and put a hand on his shoulder. "Logan, calm down."

"Calm down? How can I calm down? I spent all this time convincing myself that he was happy here and that he... that he wanted to be with me and... all of a sudden he just leaves? Just when I'm beginning to accept that things are going my way..."

"We'll find him..."

"Why bother?" Logan whispered. "He doesn't want to be with me!"

"Yes, he does!" James said sternly. "He's extremely insecure, you knew that going into this. That's why you two are such a perfect match, because you're both so fragile. You have to find him. He needs you and you need him!"

"I never wanted to _need_ anyone. I never even wanted to _want_ anyone."

James sighed. "Well that's too bad. I know you thought you could just hide behind your loner-guy façade, but you would have been miserable. I was so glad when Kendall came along and brought you out of your shell."

"I didn't do it for me... I just wanted to show him how much he means to me..."

"Exactly. You unknowingly were becoming a stronger person by trying to make Kendall stronger. But he was in a bad place in his mind, Logan. I know I don't know him like you do, but it's obvious he wants you to go after him."

"No he doesn't!"

"Of course he does! He may think that he's doing what's best, but sooner or later he's going to realize he misses you too much and he's going to wish he never left you. But he'll be too scared to come back. You need to bring him back."

"I... I don't know how..."

"It might take a while to find him." James admitted lowly. "And once you do, it's probably gonna take a lot of work to convince that _he's_ what's best for you, but..."

"But it'll be worth it in the end?" Logan assumed.

"Won't it?"

"Yeah, it would."

"See?"

"But James... what if you're wrong? What if he really doesn't want me? What if I can never get him back?"

"Hey, I'm James Diamond. I'm never wrong about these things."

Logan chuckled darkly. "That's true. What kind of fool would I be to not take advice from James The Almighty Expert On Dating Insecure Men?"

James cracked a sad smile. "It sounds pathetic when you say it like that."

"I'm sorry, our men are definitely not pathetic."

"See?" James comforted him. "You need to find Kendall and tell him that no matter what... you want to be with him. Can I ask you something?"

"I guess..."

"Who is Kendall?"

"What?" Logan looked up at him, confused. "You know who Kendall is. He..."

"No, I'm not asking if I know him. I'm asking if _you_ know _who he is."_

"Who he is? Well he's... he's Kendall. I met him at a soup kitchen and I hated seeing him all alone on the streets so I brought him to live with me..."

"And is he the same Kendall now that he was back then?"

Logan blinked and shook his head. "No. He's not homeless anymore. His home is here, with me. He has a family now too. I'm his family. Kendall is mine. And I need him."

"We'll find him." James nodded. "I promise."


	18. The Search Yields A Clue

**A/N: Happy Wednesday, everyone! Are you excited for another chapter? I hope it's a pleasant surprise! And please add me on facebook! There's a link in my profile! But I promise to stop bugging you about it after this week lol.**

**Chapter 18 - The Search Yields A Clue (Posted 8 June 2011)**

That morning, Logan had to do his community service, so James went out on the streets to look for any sign of Kendall.

Carlos went with him, of course, and they both tried their hardest to find him. They even checked back at the soup kitchen where Logan had first met Kendall, but he wasn't there. They asked around, and no one had seen him since he disappeared off the streets a few weeks ago.

They returned to Logan's house in the afternoon and told him they hadn't seen him.

"I hate this. If I didn't have this stupid community service, maybe he wouldn't have left." Logan cried.

"That may be true," James admitted, "but then you never would have met him either."

Logan didn't say anything, he just brooded silently

This went on for a long time. James and Carlos looked all over the city in the mornings and were joined by logan in the evenings.

But Kendall was nowhere.

And Big Time Rush was dropped from their label completely. Logan obviously never went back to them. And James quit after he was threatened for supporting Logan's relationship with Kendall.

Logan completed his month of cleaning streets and started working as a custodian at a local children's camp. Still, there was no word on Kendall's whereabouts.

"I promised we'd find him." James told his lethargic friend.

"We're never going to find him. It's been over a month. It's time to give up, James." Logan said.

"Give up? How can you say that?" Carlos asked.

"He doesn't want me to find him! If he doesn't want me, why should I waste my time doing something that's only going to upset him?"

"Maybe it's time for an alternative approach." James said thoughtfully.

"No! There is no alternative!" Logan yelled. "Face it, James, we're _never_ going to find him! We're wasting our time."

"You're saying Kendall is a waste of time?" Carlos asked innocently.

Logan looked at him and closed his eyes. "That's not what I meant."

"But you just said it." James concurred.

"It didn't come out right..." Logan argued softly.

"Logan," Carlos started, "we know you're frustrated, and we know it only gets harder every day... but you can't just give up. We haven't tried everything. We'll think of something. James and I just want to see you happy."

"Thanks." Logan whispered.

"Look," James said nicely, "you've got to go to bed. The camp starts a new bunch of kids tomorrow, so you've got a lot of work to do in the morning."

"I know." Logan sighed.

"We'll keep looking." James promised

"Thanks. But, you know... sooner or later we're going to reach that point where we really are never going to find him."

Carlos shook his head defiantly. "Only when we stop looking."

X

The next morning, Logan got ready to go to Palm Woods Children's Camp. When he came out of his room, he did something he felt a little foolish about. He walked forward to the door to the room Kendall had first stayed in. He pushed it open and gazed inside as he leaned against the doorframe.

Would Kendall still be there if he'd continued to use this room? Would he have left if Logan never made a move on him? Was it his fault he's gone?

"Oh, Kendall..." Logan hung his head, holding back the tears that threatened to burst forth ant any moment. "Why did you do this? Couldn't you see how much I..."

"Sir..." Logan heard his driver's voice through the intercom. "If we don't leave now, you will be late."

Logan had taken to being driven everywhere again since Kendall had disappeared. Half the fun of driving was the person in the passenger seat. "Yeah, I'll be right down." He quickly dressed and was out the door.

X

Upon arriving, a group of children was being given a tour of the campgrounds. There were six campsites total, but he was only in charge of maintaining the three on the north side. Some other guy with a similar sentence was in charge of the other half.

He set to work, hoping the kids would simply ignore him as they usually did. As he was trimming the hedges, a younger girl walked up behind him. She stared at him for a minute before tugging on his shirt.

"Um... hello?" Logan looked at her.

"Hi." the girl said sweetly.

"Was there... something you needed?"

"No... you just look really familiar... but you can't be who I think you are." the girl said, making a thoughtful face.

"Well, maybe I am. Logan Mitchel, former member of Big Time Rush, at your service." He smiled broadly, trying not to scare her away.

"Wow!" the girl gasped. "It really is you! My brother would totally freak out if he knew I met you!"

"Your brother is a fan of mine?" Logan asked.

"Yeah." the girl nodded. "Or... he used to be. I don't know if he is anymore..."

"What do you mean?" Logan was curious.

"Oh, nothing... it's not important. Nothing a hot shot like you would be interested in hearing..."

"Try me," Logan said nicely, sitting down and patting the ground beside him. She sat and he continued to talk. "I'm actually a pretty good listener despite my popstarness."

The girl giggled a little before the sad look returned to her face. "I got separated from my brother a long time ago. He was really great. He always protected me and took care of me. And our mom too..."

"What about your dad?"

"I don't remember him. He died when I was real little."

Logan's eyes went wide as realization struck him. A little girl with brown hair and big puppy-dog eyes, missing her brother? "Katie?"

The girl looked at him in surprise. "How do you know my name?"

"Oh my God! It's you! Katie Knight!" Logan jumped to his feet, his smile simply beaming.

Katie stood as well and gave him a this-dude-must-be-crazy look. "Seriously dude, you're freaking me out! How do _you_ know _my_ name?"

Logan hugged her. "I know all about you. Your name is Katherine Claire Knight and you have a crush on my best friend, James. You're really smart and convince anyone to do anything because of how adorable you are. He wasn't exaggerating either, you are so cute! But what are you doing here? He said you were far away..."

"Woah woah woah!" Katie held her hands up. "Who is 'he' and why do you know so much about me." Then she pointed at him. "And I do _not_ have a crush on James."

Logan laughed. "Your brother! I know Kendall!"

Katie's eyes got wide. "You do?"

"Yes!"

"_My_ brother? How... how can you know _my_ brother...?"

"I..."

Just as Logan was going to tell her everything, a whistle blew.

"That's the huddle-up whistle. I gotta go..."

"But wait... don't you want to know about Kendall?"

Katie reached behind her and pulled a notebook out of her backpack. She took the pen that was clipped to it and scribbled something down. "Here. This is my phone number. Call me next week." Then she turned and ran back to the rest of the campers.

Logan looked at the paper. He smiled at the pink ink. He'd found Kendall's sister. He was one step closer to finding Kendall.


	19. Reaching Out

**A/N: Wednesdays are my favorite days :D**

**Chapter 18 - Reaching Out (Posted 15 June 2011)**

"His sister?" James's eyes were wide with surprise. "How do you know it's her?"

"She looked just like he described her. And then she started talking about how she was separated from her family and she told me her brother is a huge fan of mine. I told her I knew Kendall and she gave me her phone number." Logan beamed.

"Are you gonna call her?" Carlos asked.

"She told me to call her next week."

"Next week?" James asked.

"Yeah." Logan nodded. "She's a pretty smart girl, I think. It would look pretty odd for a creepy janitor to talk to a little girl. So I have to wait until she goes home."

"But... won't it be weird if a grown man calls her house?" Carlos wondered.

"Oh..." Logan wrinkled his nose. "Why does everything I do make me look like a creeper?"

James and Carlos laughed.

"You'll just have to explain it to her parents." James offered.

"Yeah," Logan rolled his eyes, "they're really going to believe me when I call their house saying I'm the custodian at her camp but I'm really Logan Mitchell and I'm calling to talk to her about her brother. That's a wonderful first impression."

"Hey, what else can you do, you know?" Carlos said. "This is an amazing lead, Logan. You have to call."

"Carlos is right." James slapped his hand on Logan's shoulder. "She may have been separated from him, but she probably wants to find him as much as you do. If you work together, you'll have a better chance."

"I know." Logan said, determined. "I'm gonna call them next Monday. And... I've got an idea."

X

TWO DAYS LATER:

"Dude!" James yelled excitedly. "How did you get us an interview on the Today show?"

"I have connections." Logan said carelessly.

"Connections? What connections? We have the same connections." James said.

"Just... connections." Logan assured him.

"Ok... so we're going to be interviewed about our disbandment, right?"

"Yep." Logan said. "We're going to tell them the whole story, I'll start with meeting Kendall and then being threatened, and then you can tell them about why you quit."

"And then you'll be able to get the word out about our search for Kendall." James guessed.

"Exactly." Logan poked him on the chest. "I'll tell every single person out there that my boyfriend is missing. I've got a picture of him that they're gonna show on air, and I'm gonna ask them all to be on the lookout for him."

"And you're gonna do this every week?"

"Every week. And they're gonna repeat the story for about a minute every _day_ to keep people looking for him."

"Wow, you really do have connections." James joked.

"I sure do. And I plan on using every one of them to find Kendall."

"You know, I'm really glad you found Katie. You were just about ready to lose hope, but meeting her like supercharged you or something. You just seem so much more... alive."

"I know." Logan nodded. "I'm so glad she came up to me. Not just because she can help me find Kendall. But I can help reunite her with their brother. And, if everything goes according to plan, their mother as well."

"Their mom? How do you plan on doing that?"

"Just trust me, James. This plan can't fail."

X

"And now, here to tell us their story, former Rocque Records duo Big Time Rush, James Diamond and Logan Mitchell!" Matt Lauer's voice rang out throughout the studio as the boys walked on stage. "Hello, boys." he shook their hands and motioned for them to have a seat. "So, this was kind of last minute, wasn't it?"

Both boys laughed and nodded.

"Yeah." James said. "We came out today to, uh, clear up some rumors having to do with why we left Rocque Records."

"I see." Lauer smiled. "So, Logan, I understand you were actually _threatened_ by Gustavo Rocque. Can you tell us a little about that?"

"I'd be glad to." Logan said. "You see, as most of my fans know, I'd recently been sentenced to community service for a minor disturbance involving loud music, nothing major really. I started serving it at a soup kitchen. And I wasn't exactly... welcomed."

"Not welcome?" Matt asked. "Please explain."

"Gladly. Going in, I didn't really have any experience in community service besides the time when I was in boy scouts when I was a little boy. And I guess the homeless and otherwise less fortunate people didn't have much respect for me since I was a pop star with lots of money. And... I guess I can see where they're coming from. I had everything and more while they had absolutely nothing. No one would take any food from me."

"Wow." Matt was a little shocked. "So what did you do?"

"Well, around the end of my shift, one boy came up to me and took some soup, claiming that he didn't care whether he respected me or not, I had food and he was hungry."

"Sounds like a smart boy." Matt observed.

"Very smart." Logan commented. "After that day, they had me cleaning and then they put me in the back so I wouldn't upset the people again. And I kept an eye out for that guy. But he never stayed inside. And one day... I was just sick of seeing him outside all alone so I went out and talked to him. We'd become friends... and I just couldn't let him out on the streets, so I invited him to come stay with me."

"You invited a homeless man that you just met into your house?"

"Yeah. I trusted him. And I just wanted to help him."

"What does all this have to do with Rocque Records?" Matt was intrigued.

"Well, one day, Gustavo came to my house and he was very upset about a certain magazine article. Apparently a journalist had spotted us out and took a couple photos. And I was given an ultimatum. Kick my friend out, or be dropped from the label."

"So... they wanted you to stop helping a homeless person?"

"Yes." Logan said. Someone actually understood where he was coming from. "They told me my fans would think I'm weird or even hate me for this! But they're wrong. I know my fans aren't that shallow. If anything, I'm confident that they're proud of me for sticking up to Rocque Records, just like I would expect all of them to do if they were in a similar situation. I followed my heart, and that's what's really important."

"Wow. So, James, what about you? Why did you quit instead of continuing with a solo career?"

James happily told his story. "Well, my buddy here called me up after all this happened. I was kinda upset, you know, we're a team. But I understood why he quit, and I was proud of him for it. And I was kinda bummed, but I figured as long as they didn't try any more funny business, I would stay with them. But just a little while later, they asked me if I supported Logan's decision. And I told them I did, because I'm an honest guy, and I was threatened the same way he was. So I quit."

"Wow. A multi-million dollar record company just drops you because you wanted to help a homeless man." Matt was stunned.

"Yes, exactly!" both Logan and James said.

"So," Matt started again, "I was told that Logan had sort of a... special announcement?"

"Yeah, I do." Logan stood, and all cameras were on him. "The guy I took in, his name was Kendall, Kendall Knight. And... he was a really great guy. The greatest guy I ever met. But he heard what Gustavo said, and he felt like he was in the way of my career, so he ran away. This was over a month ago and I've been looking for him nonstop but haven't been able to find him. I have a picture of him," a picture of Kendall and Logan standing side by side and smiling was shown on one side of the screen as Logan continued his monologue on the other side, "there he is. If you see him, call the number at the bottom of his picture. I'm also on a mission to reunite him with his family, so if you know him, or if you're related to him, call the number and I'll be in contact with you. And, just for security purposes, we will be checking credentials to make sure leads are legitimate. And... a special message for Kendall... if you're seeing this... there's something I need to tell you. I'd been trying to work up the courage to say it to you before you left, but I'm worried that if I don't say it now, I'll never get the chance to tell you in person. But... I love you, Kendall." The crowd gasped and awed. "And I want you to come home. I don't mean to the mansion, because without you there... it's just a huge empty house. I mean with me, Kendall. _I'm_ your home. And you're mine and I miss you. I understand why you left. And I'm not upset. I just want you back."

"Ok, you heard it here, that's the word from former band, Big Time Rush. Thanks guys, we look forward to having you back, and wish you luck on your search."

The boys nodded and waved before they were shown off the stage.

X

"Well, that went pretty good." James smiled hopefully.

"Yeah," Logan agreed half-heartedly, "I just hope it works."

"It will work." James said confidently. "We're reaching millions of people. Someone out there is bound to know something. You're smart, the odds are in your favor, aren't they?"

Logan made a thoughtful face as if he was doing some quick calculations in his head. "Just about."

"Well, that's better than nothing."

"You're right. I just have to keep my hopes high and not give up."

"Yeah. We're gonna find him. I know it, I can feel we're getting close. Plus, you still have to call Katie in a few days."

"That's true. Thanks, James."


	20. Response

**A/N: I'm posting this now because I missed last Wednesday because I had food poisoning. Chapter 21 will be up this Wednesday as scheduled :D This is just kinda like a teaser chapter, but the final few will be better.**

**Chapter 20 - Response (Posted 27 June 2011)**

Logan was pulled from his slumber by the piercing sound of his phone ringing. He sat up, trying to locate the phone in the mountain of blankets. When he finally found it, he pressed the answer button and practically screamed at the person who was on the other end. "HELLO!"

"Mr. Mitchell, sir?" a female voice said.

"Yes." Logan said groggily.

"We have a woman on the line, she says she needs to speak with you right away."

"Is she just another crazy fan?" Logan only asked because, although he was sure many of his fans were hoping he'd find Kendall, a few of them would just call to see if they could get the chance to speak to him.

"No, it doesn't sound like that. She says it's urgent. And she said to tell you 'Donald' but I'm not sure what that means. She was very adamant so I thought I'd let you know..."

"You can put her through." Logan said, interrupting her. "Donald is Kendall's middle name. She must know him."

"Yes, right away, sir." the woman said.

"Hello?" a new voice was heard.

"Hi." Logan said warily.

"Is this Logan?"

"Yep. I hear you have some information on Kendall. I appreciate you calling."

"Oh, it's no problem. I do have something, though I'm not sure how much use I'll be..."

"Hey, every little bit of effort helps."

"You really miss him." the woman observed from the sadness in his voice.

"Yeah, I do."

"So do I."

Logan's eyes went wide. "You knew him?"

"I would hope I knew him. I'm his mother, after all."

**A/N: I just saw that I started this story all the way back in February! And you guys are still reading it! That amazes me! Thanks for sticking around this long :D**


	21. Working Together

**A/N: You guys are really great! I'm kinda sad that this story is almost over... Oh and just a little tidbit that I forgot to mention in chapter 19... I don't own the Today Show. Or Matt Lauer for that matter. But I wish I did heh heh heh ^^**

**Chapter 21 - Working Together (Posted 29 June 2011)**

Logan was so shocked he couldn't breathe. It'd been a few days since he'd made the first appearance on the Today Show and so far the only leads were pretty useless. But this one was different.

"M-m-mother?" Logan sputtered.

"That's right. Jennifer Knight at your service. Well, my first husband's name was Knight. I'm Jennifer Graham now."

"So you're really Kendall's mom?"

"I sure am. And you're really Logan Mitchell?"

"Yep, that's me." Logan said, still shocked.

"Wow. My son was obsessed with you. I can't believe he actually met you..."

"Um, ma'am... I think I should tell you this right away so you don't find out later and get angry or anything but... Kendall and I were together. And I love him a lot..."

"I know, sweetheart." she said affectionately. "I saw the broadcast. I'm so glad he was able to find someone."

"Me too. I really want to find him, ma'am. I miss him so much."

"I do too. I've been trying to find him. My new husband even hired a private detective, but we kept running into dead ends. And then I heard just a few minutes ago about you on the Today show and I wondered if it was the same Kendall. When I saw the picture I just had to call right away. Maybe we could work together to find him."

"I would love to work with you." Logan said happily. "Would you like to meet with me and we can discuss it?"

"That would be great."

"Oh and... I was wondering if you've had any contact with your daughter lately?"

"No. I've been afraid to speak with her. I'm sure I could find her fairly easily since I know the name of her foster parents but..."

"I understand." Logan said, remembering Kendall saying something similar. "But just so you know, I met her a few days ago. She misses you and Kendall a lot. I'm going to call her soon to see if she'd like to help as well, so if you'd like to be reunited with her, I'd be happy to bring it up when I talk with her foster parents."

"I'm not sure..." she said hesitantly.

"It's fine, just let me know if you change your mind."

"I will." she said. "So, where would you like to meet?"

Logan gave her a time and the name of a local restaurant and agreed to meet with her there later that day. Turns out she lived nearby. And he couldn't help wondering if maybe if he'd taken Kendall out more, they might have run into her. But he couldn't dwell on it. He couldn't go back and prevent him from leaving, but he was going to do anything within his power to bring him back. And maybe now he could bring his family back together for him and show him just how many people really care about him.

**A/N: Sorry this is so short again. It was originally the second half of chapter 20. Chapter 22 will be a lot longer, I promise, and some big things will happen. It's not quite the end, but it's getting close. Thanks :D**


	22. A Family Affair

**A/N: Not sure how much I like this chapter. I hope I didn't fudge the end up... Please tell me what you think :D**

**Chapter 22 - A Family Affair (Posted 6 July 2011)**

Logan walked into the restaurant with a big jacket and sunglasses on so it wouldn't be so easy to recognize him. He saw a woman matching the description Kendall had given him sitting at a booth and slid into the seat across from her.

"Mrs. Graham?"

"Logan." she smiled sweetly. "It's very nice to meet you." She stuck out her hand and Logan shook it, flashing back to that first time he shook Kendall's hand. She was a very pretty woman, looking younger than he knew her to be, but she looked tired.

"It's nice to meet you too. Uh... I'm a little nervous, I've never met any of Kendall's family, so..."

"It's fine, dear. I know the feeling; it's not every day you find out your son's been being taken care of by a pop star."

"Mrs. Graham..." Logan tried to get serious.

"Please, call me Jennifer."

"Ok... Jennifer. I want you to know that Kendall is very special to me and... I know you're his mother and you love him but I just have to ask... why are you trying to find him but not Katie?"

Jennifer sat back in her seat and got a faraway look in her eyes. "Kendall is an adult. When we lost our house, he was already capable of taking care of himself. But Katie was just a child. Even with both Kendall and I doing everything we could for her... we just couldn't take care of her. And so I called child services and had her put into foster care. They gave me a deadline and said that if I could get a job and a place to live, I could have her back. But I wasn't ready by the deadline. And as much as I wanted to be with my little girl... I knew she'd be better of with a family that could give her a home. So I signed the adoption papers and now she has two very lovely parents and another adopted sister."

"That really doesn't tell me why you don't want to have her back now..." Logan said. "I'm not trying to stick my nose into other people's business, but you're Kendall's family, so I care about you."

Jennifer sighed. "After I was separated from Kendall, I met Jeff. I was trying to get a job as a waitress and we started talking and... we became really good friends. It was an instant connection. I told him about my late husband and my children and how my family got torn apart, and he wanted to do anything he could to help. And one day... out of the blue he just asked me to marry him. He said he knew I had some baggage and that I would probably never love anyone as much as my husband, and that he wouldn't want me to change any of that. He wanted me as I was and if all I could offer him was friendship, that he would be ok with that even in marriage. So I married him."

"Did you fall in love with him?"

"A little bit. We've only been together a few months, and no one could ever replace my first husband, but he's good to me. And he'd be good to my kids too, if I ever find them. I don't really _love_ him, but he was the one person who tried to help me out and didn't really ask for anything in return. But anyway, he's not wealthy but he did come up with enough money to hire a P.I. to look for Kendall. But he just kept coming to dead ends or going in circles. And when he offered to try and find Katie... I told him I knew where she was. Basically, anyway. But Katie is in a good home. With a wonderful family, going to a good school and making new friends. Biologically she's mine, but I did what was best for her and gave her away. She's not my daughter anymore, she's the Cole's daughter I don't want to take her away from that."

"I see." Logan nodded. "Kendall said more or less the same thing. I offered to try and find you and Katie, and he said both of you were better off without him. At least for now."

"He always was mature for his age." Jennifer wiped her eyes. "With his father passing away and everything, he had to grow up very quickly to become like a father for Katie. That's why I wanted to find him and bring him home. I wanted to give him a chance at having a childhood while he's still young enough to."

"Oh..."

"But I don't think bringing him to live with me and Jeff would be right."

"Why?"

"Because he has you." she said simply.

"Jennifer, I don't want to take your son from you..."

"Oh, hush. I told you, he's all grown up. If I would have found him before you, I would have brought him home and done my best to recreate our little family. But he's a grown man who can make his own decisions, and I think he'd rather be with you. It's time for him to finally just be happy and not have to worry about taking care of anyone for a while. I think you're the best one to give him that, after hearing what you said on the Today show. My apartment with Jeff would never be his home."

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't be sorry. Every parent goes through this. They all fly out of the nest at some point. I'm just really glad he found someone who cares about him a much as you do." she sat forward and smiled at him. She was so like her son, they even smiled the same.

"I have an idea to bring Kendall back." Logan said suddenly. "It would work better if you were to help me out."

"I'd be glad to."

X

"You can do it." Carlos cheered.

"You _have _to do it." James said.

"Since when are _you_ the one with all the answers?" Logan asked as he glared at the phone he was holding in both his shaking hands.

"Since always, you just started paying attention to it recently." James said proudly.

"I can't do it." Logan put the phone down on his kitchen counter. "They're not going to believe me. And if they do, they're gonna think I'm crazy."

"Yep." James declared.

"Probably." Carlos supported his boyfriend.

"You two aren't helping!" Logan started hyperventilating.

"Dude," James put a hand on his friend's shoulder, "just calm down. You want to find Kendall right?"

"Of course."

"And she wants to see her brother again."

"Yeah."

"Then just call her."

"I... can't! They're gonna think I'm creepy and then they probably won't let her help me anyway so..."

"Logan." Carlos said. "You'll never know unless you call."

"I know." Logan said, defeated. "I know but... I just really want this to work. I don't want her parents thinking I'm a prankster or anything."

"All you can do is try." James gave a hopeful look.

"Right." Logan put on a determined face. "I can do this."

"That's the spirit!" Carlos cheered.

Logan nodded and punched in the number Katie had given him. The phone rang and rang and rang. He was about to give up when someone answered. "Cole residence," a man answered.

"Um... Hello. My name is Logan... I'm calling to speak to your daughter, Katie."

"You sound a little old to be calling for her." the man said.

"Yeah, I should probably talk to you first. Um... you see, I'm a custodian at the day camp she goes to and..."

"A custodian? Listen, buddy, I don't tolerate perverts..."

"I'm not a pervert!" Logan shouted as he blushed. "Please, just listen to me. I know Katie's brother. And she wanted to know more about him, so she asked me to call her."

"A likely story."

"I figured you wouldn't believe me. But thanks for your time anyway, sir."

"Hang on..." the man said just before Logan was about to hang up.

"Yes?"

"Are you the boy that was on tv?"

"Yes."

"Wow! Someone famous has called our house! What was your name again?"

"Logan Mitchell."

"That's right, from that rush band that isn't Rush."

"Um... yeah." Logan said.

"You really know Katie's brother?"

"I do."

"And you're really gay?"

Logan sighed. "I am. Is that a problem?"

"Oh, no, it's just my wife and I always wondered about you and your band mate. I believed the rumors. She didn't. Just wanted to settle a bet. Anyway, would you like to come over and meet with Katie? We'd love for her to be able to see her brother again."

"For real?" Logan jumped excitedly.

"Of course."

"I would absolutely love to meet with her. And... there's one more thing I'd like to ask you."

X

"Mrs. Graham, calm down, you'll do fine." Logan patted Kendall's mother's back. It was once again time for Logan to appear on the Today show, but this time he had a few tricks up his sleeve.

"I'm just so nervous. I've never been on television before."

"I know, but just say what's in your heart and don't worry about the audience, it's Kendall you're speaking to."

"You're right, dear. I just hope this works."

"I think it will. Everyone is being very supportive. People have been posting signs all over the area and wearing 'Come home, Kendall' t-shirts. I knew my fans loved me but I didn't know they'd respond so passionately. Somehow, he'll get our message."

"All we can do is hope, right?"

"Right." Logan nodded.

"Logan, you're on." a guy with a headset told them.

"Ok, let's go, Mrs. Graham."

Logan was introduced and gave much the same message he had the first time. Until the very end, he said something new. "And Kendall, wherever you are, I have a surprise for you." He motioned his arm and Jennifer walked on stage. "Everyone, this is Kendall's mother whom he was separated from almost a year ago. She came to me asking if we could work together to find him." He nodded, giving her the go-ahead.

"Hello." she said sheepishly. "I have a message for my son. Kendall, if you're out there watching this, I miss you. And I want you to know that I'm doing very well now, so you don't have to hide from me anymore. We may have been separated but I know the only reason we never saw each other again was because you thought I'd be better off. But things are better now. And I want my son back."

"Thank you." Logan said softly to her as they were ushered off the stage.

"It's no problem. We both want to find him."

"Yeah." Logan agreed. "Um, how would you like to take a ride with me?"

"A ride?"

"In my limo. My chauffeur is a very talented driver, so you'd be very safe. I'd just like to show my appreciation..."

"A limo? That does sound nice..." she said thoughtfully

"Please?" Logan gave a charming smile.

"Well... why not." she said happily.

"Great." Logan led her outside and opened the door to his limo for her. She climbed in and he slipped in after her and they drove away.

Then the chauffeur's voice came through a speaker system. "To the place we discussed earlier, sir?"

"Yes, please." Logan pressed a button and answered.

"Where are we going?" Jennifer asked, looking around.

"It's not far. It's just somewhere I thought you'd like to see."

They continued talking about Kendall and different menial things until they pulled up to a big blue house.

"This house looks kind of familiar to me..." Jennifer said quietly.

"I thought it might. Come on." He helped her out of the vehicle and walked her up to the door of the house. He knocked and they only had to wait a few seconds until the door was opened.

By a cute little girl with puppy eyes.


	23. Terrified

**A/N: I don't know if my notes are annoying you guys yet lol, but I really wanna thank you guys for all the reviews! I feel like I don't say that enough. Sort of another teaser chapter here, but I don't think you'll be disappointed *insert evil cackle here***

**Chapter 23 - Terrified (Posted 13 July 2011)**

Jennifer locked eyes with the little girl. Though they'd been separated for so long, they recognized each other instantly.

"Mom." Katie asked quietly. This person _looked_ like her mom. But was she really back? Was she suddenly back after all this time? Just like that? No call, no letter, nothing to announce it? How could she be standing there so easily?

"...Katie." Jennifer choked out. She stood there in shock as her daughter stared back at her.

Logan put his hand on Jennifer's shoulder. "I know you said you didn't want to. And I'm sorry for going against your wishes, but I thought you were wrong. She missed you and when she asked me if she could see you, well, I just couldn't say no to those adorable eyes." _Besides, Kendall will want them together before he sees them_.

"Mom, you're back!" Katie said excitedly as she jumped up and hugged her mother.

Jennifer was still a little stiff from the shock of seeing her daughter as she hugged her.

"I got permission from the Coles." Logan told her. "They said they'd love to have you over to see Katie. They really want her to be able to see her real family and..." Logan's cell phone suddenly rang loudly. He pulled the phone out and looked at the screen. It was a number he didn't know, so he ignored it. "And they'd really like to speak with you about being involved in her life now that you've been reunited. Since this is a family thing, I think it's best if I leave. I've got another car on the way and the driver will take you home whenever you like."

"Thank you." Jennifer locked eyes with him. Their intensity, which was so similar to Kendall's, made his chest ache. He missed Kendall so much.

Beep. Logan's phone notified him that he had a voicemail. He watched as Jennifer was welcomed into the Coles' home and hoped that she and Katie would have a happy reunion and would become as close as they once were.

After climbing into the back of his limo, he finally took out his phone and decided to listen to that voicemail. He wasn't prepared for what he heard.

Someone was breathing raggedly for the first few seconds until a raspy voice choked out, "Logan." The voice was choppy and quiet, but Logan knew it right away. "Logan... please..." the voice tried to continue but suddenly, BANG! CRASH! A different person could be heard chuckling darkly in the background and then some more scattered noises. "Twenty five... twenty five..." the same voice from before was back, but the owner sounded like he was in even more pain. Another thud, a scream, and then CLICK, the message ended as the phone was hung up.

Logan gaped at his phone and struggled to catch his breath. _Kendall_. Kendall was in trouble. Someone was _hurting_ him. Logan saw red. Who would dare lay a hand on someone so innocent and lovable as Kendall? Didn't they know who he belonged to?

He pounded his fist on a button at his side that allowed him to speak to the driver. "Home, now. And hurry."

"Yes, sir." the driver's voice echoed through the vehicle, but Logan didn't hear it. He didn't feel the car speed up and he didn't hear the wind whipping by outside. All he kept thinking about was the voicemail, imagining what could have been happening. Kendall sounded terrified. Who was filling him with such terror? How did they get him? How long have they had him? And where were they keeping him?


	24. Ransom

**A/N: Heh, sorry for leaving you guys on such a cliffhanger. Hope these next few chapters make up for it :D**

**Chapter 24 - Ransom (Posted 20 July 2011)**

"I'm sorry, Mr. Mitchell," the police officer repeated, "but we _cannot_ trace a call once the line is disconnected."

Logan angrily held up his phone. "It's a _cell _phone! The number is right there! Just give me a computer and _I _can track it down."

"Our computers are strictly for police use only, young man."

"Oh for the love of-!" Logan started typing something on his phone. "I'll just do it on my phone." He began reading. "Dammit! It's from a pay phone. It won't tell me where it is."

"I'm sorry, son." the officer said. "We'll do everything we can to find your friend."

"Boyfriend." Logan corrected.

"Right."

"Don't you understand that he's in danger?" Logan asked loudly. "The most amazing person in the world is out there somewhere, scared and in pain, and all you're doing is standing there?"

"Listen kid," the officer got an attitude, "I know you're worried about him. But we're in one of the most crime-filled cities in the _world_. We've got thousands of cases like this that we've been working on for months. We are doing everything that we can."

"But did you listen to the message? He kept saying 'twenty five'! Can't you use that to find him? Look in all the businesses and addresses with twenty five in them or something!"

"We can't get a warrant for that many places."

"Well... but... ugh this isn't helping. I'm gonna go looking for him. If you find anything, please call me."

"Will do."

Logan shook his head angrily as he ran out the door. He sped home in his fastest car. It had just been a few hours since he got the call from Kendall. He'd gone straight to the police and given statements and everything, not realizing that it would be this much of a waste of time.

He quickly picked up James and Carlos so they could go looking together.

"Man this is so scary." Carlos said, feeling bad for both Kendall and Logan.

"We're gonna find him, Logan." James assured him. "We have to find him."

"I don't even know where to start. There are so many twenty fives around here, it'd take is weeks to check them all out!"

"Well what about The Twenty Five Floors Motel?" James asked. "He might be there."

"Guys?" Carlos said.

"No, these people wouldn't be keeping him in a hotel. Plus he called me from a pay phone and there was banging around and stuff. It's gotta be like a warehouse or something like that." Logan said.

"Guys." Carlos said a little louder.

"Well what about Twenty-Fifth Street?" James suggested.

"I guess we can look there, but that's in the opp-"

"Guys!" Carlos shouted and pointed out Logan's window. "Look at that sign!" He was pointing to a large billboard on top of a tall building. It was advertising a new housing development to be built over the next year. "See? It says '25 new homes being built.' Do you think maybe he saw that sign from somewhere?"

"I don't know," Logan said, "but that's our best lead right now. Great work, Carlos."

"There's a warehouse a street over." James pointed for him to turn ahead and again further down the road. "See! There it is! There's even a pay phone in front of it!"

"You guys are geniuses!" Logan exclaimed as he quickly parked the car and hopped out. "You guys just wait here. There's pepper spray and baseball bats under the back seat if you have any trouble, ok?"

"Got it." James said, reaching under the seat.

"What about you?" Carlos asked. "You can't go in there unprotected."

Logan lifted up his shirt. Underneath was a belt with a holster strapped around his torso.

"Woah!" Carlos exclaimed.

"What is that?" James asked in awe.

"A stun gun." Logan said. "Don't ask me how I got it. I have connections, ok? Just stay here." Logan shut the car door and walked up to the building. He was afraid to try the front door, in case it made too much noise and he was discovered, so he walked around to an alley beside the building and found a ventilation shaft. He climbed on top of a garbage can and jumped into the shaft, trying to see if it could give him access to the building.

Success. It was open. He crawled through it and came upon some voices. He found a grate below him and laid his ear on it to listen closer.

"Thought he had more stamina than that." a gruff voice joked.

"Yeah." a nasally voice agreed. "Looked like he had more fight in him."

Logan felt his face heat up in anger. But he kept listening.

"The boss said he would deliver the ransom letter."

As if on cue, Logan's cell gave a vibrated softly in his pocket. He pulled it out and saw he had a text message from a protected number. "We have what you want. Cooperate and he'll be safe."


	25. Rescue

**A/N: What? The final chapter? Yes. This is the end. It's been a nice run, and I couldn't be happier to have you all reading and reviewing this for as long as you have. So thanks so much for sticking with me, and I hope you've enjoyed it as much as I have :D**

**Chapter 25 - Rescue (Posted 27 July 2011)**

_Dammit! _Logan thought. The number was protected, so he couldn't even reply! What was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to cooperate if he wasn't given any directions? Whoever was holding Kendall hostage obviously hadn't thought this through very well. He waited, sweating in the hot ventilation chamber, for another message explaining what he was supposed to do, but nothing came. But just as he decided it was time to take things into his own hands, he heard a door open up in the back.

"Do you have him?" a recognizable, angry voice shouted.

Logan gasped silently and looked through the grate. He was fuming when he saw a round body waddle in. Gustavo. He'd avoided looking in until now, afraid of what he might see. And when his eyes drifted from Gustavo to a crumpled mess laying on the floor, he almost couldn't contain his rage. There was Kendall, slumped over, with his arms tied around a pole behind him. His clothes were rattier than they were when he met him and he was almost covered in blood. His hair was matted against his skin and he was barely breathing.

At this point, he was so enraged, he was about to crush his phone in an attempt to make a fist. Not only had they kidnapped him, but they'd beaten him and treated him like some kind of animal. He watched as Gustavo walked over to the two men who must have been the ones he heard talking earlier.

"Did you send the ransom?" the gruff voiced-man said. He was greasy-haired and short, and wore a snarl like that of an aging pit bull.

"The first part." Gustavo answered.

"Look," the second guy said. He was tall and looked stoned, but obviously meant business. "Ya said we'd get paid cash for this. We nabbed this kid weeks ago, why'd ya wait till now to send the ransom?"

"Because!" Gustavo yelled. "Logan has to think he ran away and we took him off the streets, or else he might call the cops."

"He might call the cops now! I told you the kid almost got away from us. What if someone spotted him?" the short guy seethed.

"No one spotted him." Gustavo waved his hand through the air. "It's fine. I'll send Logan the text telling him what we want, and then I'll tell him where he can pick Kendall up. Little punk thinks he can just resign from my label and get away with it, well this'll show him."

"What?" the tall guy asked. "That kid can't see us, man. Who's gonna meet him?"

"You guys will, or it's no deal." Gustavo told them. "You hide here, and when Logan walks in, you ambush him and grab the money and the contract. And then we run out of here, and leave Logan to cry over his dead, homeless boyfriend."

Logan's eyes went wide with anger and fear. "Dead?" he whispered to himself. _Oh my God, they're gonna kill him_. He lifted his phone and texted James.

X

James and Carlos were still out in Logan's car, worrying like crazy when James's phone suddenly beeped. "It's a text from Logan." He opened it and looked at Carlos, surprise on his face.

"What? What is it?" Carlos asked impatiently.

"It's Gustavo, our old producer! He kidnapped Kendall!"

"What do we do?"

"I... I don't know. Should we call the cops? I think we should call the cops."

"Yeah." Carlos nodded, and then got an idea. "You call the police, and I'll make a few calls too."

James looked confused as he dialed. "Who are you calling?"

"Just a few people who might be willing to help out."

X

Logan was developing an intricate and very well thought out plan in his mind as he watched the three men interact. He hated all of them, but he couldn't bring himself to look at Kendall. He thought of the first time he saw him, how it felt when he first shook his hand. How much he just wanted to help him and give him a better life. How easy it was to fall in love with him. And right now he just couldn't stand to look at him in this state, broken to near death.

So he listened for a few minutes, trying to make out what they were saying. He wanted more than anything to just lift that grate, jump down there, and kick some evil kidnapper ass. But he knew he couldn't take all three of them, even with his stun gun. So he waited a few more minutes, and just when he was about to say 'screw it' and lift the grate, he got a text back from James.

"_We're taking care of it."_

Taking care of it? He was about to answer when the tall man stiffened.

"Shh! Shut up!" he hissed. "Are those... police sirens?"

"No." the smaller one insisted. "It's probably an ambulance."

But then Logan heard the sirens as well, and those were definitely not ambulance sirens. And he took this opportunity to rip the grate out and jump down, startling the three men.

"You _asshole_." Logan glared at Gustavo.

"Woah, who's the brat?" the tall grease ball asked.

"Wh am _I_?" Logan asked. "I'm the 'brat' you've been talking about for the past ten minutes. I'm also the boyfriend of the man you _abducted_ from _my house_, beat, and tied to a pole." Logan's breath was coming in huffs. He was shaking with rage and adrenaline, standing before them in a menacing pose. "And I am also the last person you want to screw around with."

As if on cue, the sirens leveled out, signaling that the cars had come to a stop and were surrounding the building. And then a strong voice came through a megaphone. "We've got the place surrounded, you have thirty seconds to come out with your hands up."

"Don't let them get Kendall!" Gustavo yelled.

The tall guy pulled up his pant leg and took out a pistol, aiming it right at Kendall.

Logan saw red as he lunged toward the man and knocked him to the ground before swinging his arm and flinging the gun from the guy's hold. "Nice try." he sneered.

By this time the cops were swarming inside the warehouse, pummeling the other two men and pulling Logan off the third. He was almost disappointed; he so wanted to take his revenge on the people who dared to hurt Kendall. Until he saw a mass of tele-reporters rush in and begin interviewing Gustavo about why he did it.

He watched as Gustavo and the two cronies were taken away, all cursing at each other. He turned around, intending on rushing to Kendall's side, only to see him being lifted and carried off by a team of paramedics. And then he was asked to ride back to the station for a statement.

X

Two weeks later, Kendall woke up disoriented in a hospital bed. He was confused, having hardly any memory of who he was for a second, until he saw a beautiful face at his side. "Logan." his voice was hoarse and his throat kinda hurt, but it didn't matter.

"Hi." Logan wasn't exactly sure what to say. "H-how are you feeling?"

"Better, now that you're here." Kendall smiled even though his face was still sore.

"I thought you ran away." Logan said, letting some tears fall to the floor.

"Gustavo wrote the note." Kendall said. "He came into the house and I tried to wake you up but they taped over my mouth and tied me up, and..."

"Oh, Kendall..." Logan reached out and grabbed Kendall's hand. "It's not your fault. Gustavo's handy men ratted him out right away. He's in jail awaiting a trial. He wanted to get revenge on me for quitting; he was going to ask for some money and the right for his company to use my name in promotions and merchandise. But I don't even care about that right now. All I care about is that you're ok."

"I'm fine."

"I'm so sorry, Kendall. I had no idea you were being hurt..."

"Logan, do you really think I would blame you for this?"

"No, but... I mean I thought you sounded kind of depressed that night and then when I saw the note I just lost it. I tried so hard to find you but I couldn't and I didn't know why and I even found your mother and your sister to try and get you to come back and-"

Kendall sat up. "You found them?"

Logan nodded. "Yeah. Your sister was at a camp I had to work at and your mother saw me on the Today show and then she called me. They've been spending a lot of time together lately and going on the show with me trying to get you home. They really miss you, Kendall. And whenever you're ready, they want to see you again."

"Thanks." Kendall said, still a little shocked. "You did all that just to find me?"

"Of course." Logan said with a smile. "I would have done anything to get you back. I love you."

Kendall's lips stretched into a wide grin. "I love you too." Logan really started to cry then, making Kendall chuckle a little. "Why are you crying, Logan?"

"I'm just so glad to see you again."

"I know how you feel. I can't tell you how happy I was to hear your voice. I... I honestly thought I was going to die. But then you were there. And you saved me." Kendall lifted an arm and put a hand on Logan's cheek.

And then Logan couldn't wait any longer. He leaned down and pressed his lips against Kendall's, kissing him, finally. "So. The Doctor said when you wake up you could come home. That is... if you want to come back with me."

"Why wouldn't I want to go with you? You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. You gave me a home. Took care of me. Put up with my self-doubting and helped me whenever I was feeling down. You found my family and rescued me from kidnappers and have to wonder whether I want to go back home with you?"

"I just don't want you to feel like I'm pressuring you."

"Didn't you hear me just now? I love you, remember? I want to be with you."

"Ok." Logan nodded, beaming as he was filled with happiness. "Well, I'll get a nurse to discharge you and then we can go back to the mansion."

"I can't wait."

Logan went to stand up straight until he was pulled back down by Kendall, arms wrapped around his neck, lips being crushed against each other as they parted and their tongues began a swift ballet. When Kendall finally released him, they were both panting.

Kendall smirked. "There's more where that comes from." He winked, making Logan blush a little bit.

"I'll go get the nurse, and then you can show me exactly where it came from."


	26. SEQUEL

**Surprise! I'm back again with one last thing to say before this storyline really comes to a close.**

A lot of you have been asking about a sequel. And the truth is that I've kinda been planning for this to be a two-part series since I started it. But I didn't want to say anything in case the first half got a bad response. Obviously, I had nothing to worry about.

So, to answer the question, yes, I will be writing a sequel. It won't be as long as this story, probably around four or five chapters. I pretty much have the outline of everything that's going to happen so it should be coming along within a few weeks.

However, I'm not sure exactly I will be able to really sit down and focus on writing. I finished all my summer homework and everything to make time for more writing during this last month before school, but suddenly something else has come up. My grandmother was taken to the hospital literally just a few minutes before I posted this, and things aren't looking so good right now. And being pretty much the only family she has locally, I'm going to have a lot of work to do if things continue to go downhill for her.

Anyway, I just wanted you all to be aware that the sequel _is_ on its way, and will be titled "Live In Motion" and it will deal with what happens to the four boys only a few weeks after Kendall is released from the hospital. So be on the lookout for it sometime midway through August, I think that's my best estimate right now with everything that's happened. And thank you all again for being so supportive and for all the reveiws/alerts/favorites, it means a lot to me :)

**-Hana  
**


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